Amanda Lee

My father's work ethic. Modeling after him has allowed me to not only be a respected professional but also successful and liked. Growing up he always had multiple jobs - a full time demanding job and part-time jobs. Nothing was beneath him and he did every job with the same dedication, effort, and a smile. For many years, he flew around the world and met dignitaries as part of his day job, and cleaned the pool of a wealthy elderly couple on the weekends, and worked security at a restaurant on Friday nights. Never once did he treat the pool cleaning job or security position as less than any other - the job he was doing at the time was treated it as though it was the most important. He arrived early, worked overtime, and went above and beyond at all times, regardless of the task. And this is why I take pride in hard work and doing well at every task I take on. This has led to a successful career as a trial attorney and the founder and CEO of my own consulting firm. It has made me always take pride in my work, never settle, and always seek opportunities to do more.

Embrace where you are but always plan for what's next. If you don't have goals or ideas about your next move, you will become stagnant. Throughout my career I learned that what felt successful 5 years ago quickly becomes status quo and unless you are satisfied with status quo, which I am not, you need to always be thinking bigger. This doesn't mean you must change jobs every five years but it means you should be looking at what more can you do - possibly in a different job or position or possibly at the same job but with more responsibilities. I never want to look back and see that I have been doing the same thing for five years without any growth.  

The Lee Consultants is dedicated to transforming the narrative around high-achieving professionals who experience domestic abuse. Our mission is to raise awareness and challenge misconceptions, while also offering tailored support services to meet the unique needs of this demographic. Changing perceptions, confronting misconceptions, and filling a gap in services is inherently challenging.

Society has embraced the idea of a victim who is low income or financially dependent, uneducated, and unemployed or earning minimum wage. And, although statements that ‘abuse knows no boundary’ are included in all domestic violence campaigns, society often shuns the truth that a victim could also be someone who holds an advanced degree, has a successful career, is in a position of authority or leadership, is known and respected in their community, or is financially independent. Additionally, the common description of domestic violence is limited to physical abuse – the stereotypical woman with the black eye or broken arm. But this fails to address other forms of abuse that fall under the domestic violence umbrella – these other types of abuse are typically less understood, yet equally and sometimes more traumatizing. These misconceptions have dire consequences to victims who don’t fit the accepted mold - and these are the narratives that I am striving to change by raising awareness and providing unique and tailored services. 

The value that truly matters to me in this moment of life is authenticity. For years, I filtered my life and kept a wall between myself and the world and lived for others, not myself. This was a result of being in survival mode. That way of living kept me from discovering who I was, pursuing my passions, and forming deep, meaningful relationships. Now that I have embraced my story, am open about it, and invested in my healing, I value genuine connections, honest conversations, and being true to myself and accepting others as their true self. Choosing to value authenticity – which means admitting my struggles and faults, hasn’t diminished my strength or professionalism, in fact, it has enhanced it. I am more compassionate, less anxious, and more open to being vulnerable, which has made me a better leader and colleague, but more importantly it has made me a better mom, partner, and friend. Living in survival mode prevented me from embracing the moment – I was rarely able to be fully present in any moment because I was always trying to anticipate what would happen next and how I needed to prepare. But now, I can be present and do, feel, and experience what I want and need. This is liberating and is a feeling that I believe many survivors don’t realize they are missing until they feel it for the first time.  

I value rest and activities that fill my cup. My calendar looks like color-coded chaos with almost every waking hour demanding something from me. But I embrace down time and find it amongst the chaos. I am intentional about how I spend my time despite the demands that are put on me. For example, when my kids have a 2-hour practice, I devote 1 hour to myself, and the other hour is optional. "My" hour consists of working out, resting, or completing a task that brings me joy, and then the other hour will be left for errands or tasks that I don't enjoy (bills!), and then any extra time will usually be spent building my business or continuing "my" time. I used to think that resting was for the weak - I never allowed myself to binge tv shows or nap during the day unless I was ill, every moment of practices needed to be spend being productive for others (the house, the kids, other obligations). But now, I enjoy a Saturday nap and allow myself to binge watch a show if I want, and I give myself permission to not always be productive. I've learned prioritization and in learning that, I realized the importance of relaxation and fun.