Amber Portis

I attribute my success to my compassion, my ability to create and build relationships, and being able to meet people where they are. My authenticity is a huge part of it. I think I disarm people by being able to show them who I am through my heart and through my actions. I focus on building a relationship with people because I understand you can't do a lot with an individual if you don't have a relationship with them. You can't say a lot of tough things that you may need to say to someone if you don't have a relationship with them. My ability and my understanding of that has really created a space for me to kind of get where I'm at and has helped me with networking and having some of the relationships that I have to this day.

The best career advice I ever received came from my principal during my senior year of high school. I had moved to another location and thought I could just skate by since I had everything done, but she enrolled me in all these AP classes because of my grades. When I protested, she told me: just because you have shown that you could do it doesn't mean you still don't have to continue to show it. That resonated with me, especially now, because this was a Black woman saying this. It resonates now more than it did before because of the constant need to stay present and on top. I don't really have space to lax or lollygag. What she was telling me in that moment was that as a Black woman, you don't really have the space to stop at that just because that's what you want to do. You have to continue to show your greatness, because if you don't show it, no one's gonna see it. You're gonna be blended. I was always able to do well in school, so I didn't really feel like I needed to keep performing, but then I understand that you do. I have to keep performing until I don't want to do it anymore. That advice really helped put me in different positions because I understood that you just gotta keep going.

My advice is consistency, and you have to know that this has to be something that you really want to do. A lot of people get into it because they say they love kids, and that's great, but these are not the type of children that you would see in the forefront of the classroom. These are the children in the back. Loving children is great, but are you going to be able to really support a child when they are experiencing dysregulation and behavior that you may be targeted for? My advice is consistency and making sure that this is really something that you want to do, because this is essentially prescribed medication for an individual, and it's not fair for someone to get into this field and not know if they really want to do it, because it means a lot for other people. It changes lives. It is important, and it really sets the tone for a lot of different things. If you're coming in and you're unsure and you don't really know and you're not confident, it may show. But your consistency, and if it's something that your heart is really into it, and it's not about accolades and it's not about a pat on the back, the most reward you get is seeing your work in the life transaction. My advice is being okay with being the underdog while also knowing that you're the most needed in the room.

I think the biggest challenges could be misinformation. A lot of individuals may take pieces of information and run with it, and try to develop understanding and may potentially give this information over to other people, but it's just not suitable for your situation. I think sometimes there's this one-size-fits-all mentality, but it's not. Everything is very uniquely personalized in this field, and I think that although some things definitely look similar, we should always think about how things are individualized, and that one person's success doesn't mean that it's another person's failure, and vice versa. As for opportunities, I think there's opportunity for psychoeducation. So many more diagnoses are happening, and I think the fear or sometimes shame that some parents feel, where they don't want to admit those things because it gives this negative connotation versus just a true feeling of 'I don't know what to do, I'm not prepared for this,' not because they don't want to experience it, but because they don't know what to do when these things happen. I think there's an opportunity for more real conversations, conversations that provide parents the space to be candid and not judged, with an understanding that they have a different journey than other people. I think there's opportunity for real conversation, not fluffed, but real conversation that allows for people to be seen and heard, so people aren't suffering behind closed doors or guilt-tripping themselves or having these overwhelming emotions where they feel like they can't share it because it doesn't fit what you would expect a mom to feel or what you should adapt to feel.

Authenticity is definitely one of my core values. I want people to be exactly who they are. I don't want to have to guess anything. I want to know that we have connected because I see you and you see me, not because you think I want to see this version of you. If this version of you cannot be sustained, if it's not something that can last with longevity because it's not truly you, then there's no real connection. Respect is equally important to me. I want to be able to know that I'm respected just through my career, my experience, what I can bring to the table, and I come into every environment with every person showing and providing respect as well. If I'm in your home, I'm respecting, I'm greeting, I'm doing everything that I need to do for you to understand that I am a guest in your home. Respect is definitely something that I hold high, because I respect the children that I'm with as well. I believe in respecting children, I believe in providing that autonomy, because they are humans, and I just don't understand why it would be this idea that they don't deserve those things as well. I think with authenticity, the trust and the honesty and all those things kind of come hand in hand, and those things all just kind of mesh together.