Amy Kaye

I think staying grounded with my own family and really viewing it as wanting to help other families get to a better place, not getting bogged down in the emotion. A lot of people say, like, how could you do that? How could you listen to those stories every day? You just have to stay focused on trying to help people get to a better place and not getting caught up in all the emotion of it. Some people say, well, how do you not take it home? But I think the part I take home is it makes me more grateful for what I have at home. I see good people at their worst, and I'm trying to sort through that. I just hung up with a Zoom call with a guy who's a really good guy and a high-level executive here in town, and he's going through a very heated custody battle, and it's tough, and just trying to help he and his family get to a better place.

I think, number one, you've got to look at it that what we do is help people get to a better place. We've had an associate who said she can't be dating and thinking about marriage while hearing about divorce every day. But maybe you learn from it, that if you watch a situation where someone is behaving badly, hopefully you learn from that for your personal life not to do that. I think the biggest part is just that you've got to come at what we do in our industry and family law with a positive attitude that we're helping people get to a better place instead of just feeling depressed about, oh my gosh, all these people are getting divorced. I'm proudest when I've had clients who have gotten back together, and I think that's great. If I can help people stay married, especially if they have kids, that's a great outcome. I had a case that always stuck with me where my client, I actually had the husband in that one, and he called me on a Monday morning and said he was with his wife over the weekend with the kids, and one thing led to another, and they've decided to try to work it out. He said his wife is afraid to call her lawyer because her lawyer's going to tell her she's crazy, but he knew I'd be happy for him. And I said that's the best compliment you can give me.

I think the biggest challenges are, number one, when the court system gets bogged down and people need relief and can't get it. I think it's also tough when we have lawyers who get caught up in their clients' emotions and don't step back and view the situation objectively and are not solution-oriented, but are instead just looking to fight for the sport of it. That could be the client or the lawyer. In a tight economy, it's tough because people are trying to figure out how they're gonna support two households out of the same pot they previously supported one. On the opportunities side, I think this is a great field for women. As a working mom, it was great because when I compare it to when I was a corporate lawyer, that requires you to go to these corporate dinners to build a practice. But in family law, I've felt like I built my practice from living my life as a wife and mother, meeting people from my kids' school, from my kids' sports, from me playing tennis, from just living my life. I think it's a good opportunity for a working mom to be able to balance career and family. A lot of men say, I want a female lawyer because my wife says I can't get along with women, and I want you to give me that insight. And a lot of women say, I want a female lawyer because a man just doesn't understand what I'm saying. So I think there's great opportunity in family law for working moms to be able to balance. I absolutely think it's possible to have it all, to have your family and your career.

I think honesty, integrity, and kindness. What I do, it shocks me how people who've gone through, you know, been married for a long time, had kids together, could just be so cruel to each other and so unreasonable with each other. It's okay to agree to disagree, but it's not okay to just be downright mean or to be, you know, not truthful with each other.