Carol Coury Hefner

I attribute my success to resilience and faith that came through the hardest moment of my life. We had a daughter who passed away 33 years ago at a young age. She was in intensive care her whole life, and it was very, very hard on the whole family. My husband lost his business through that moment. We lost our home, we had to go down to bare bones, and pretty much after she passed, we had to start over again. It was rough, but through that, you do discover how resilient you are. Having other children, I had to get up out of bed for them. She changed our life drastically and infused a deep faith into our family that we did not have before. That changed the trajectory of the way that we approach things. A lot of people in a moment like that lose their faith, but we actually gained and grew faith, and it's been a remarkable walk ever since. My family came here two generations ago to escape Muslim persecution. My dad's parents literally lived on dirt in dugouts, in the ground for shelter in Oklahoma. They came here with nothing, and that's why when people complain about their conditions, I tell them to focus on what's ahead and what you can have. It's hard, but the accomplishment is incredible on the other side. They ended up owning car dealerships, grocery stores, and clothing stores without taking any charity. My dad and mom invested every penny into owning rental houses and just grew, grew, grew. Very disciplined people. That's why I and my siblings are so hell-bent and focused on keeping America America and growing what we have and not squandering it. We know that there's a gift in it.

The best career advice I ever received came from my husband Robert. I came home crying one day because women were asking me condescendingly what I did, and he said, 'No. From now on, I want you to tell them, I'm raising the next generation of leaders. What do you do?' I started doing that, and it changed everything. There is a lot to that, and women forget that men can't have children. We are designed to do this. If the world is going to become a better place, we have got to produce children and families. That's our job. Men just can't, they don't have those tools. We have a harder job, but we need to get over it, because we're lucky to have that job. We get to do incredible things that have generational power. So why would we complain?

I would tell young women to stop complaining about men and to look around the room and stop complaining about each other and pushing each other off the ladder. Women can be harsh with each other, hurtful with each other. They can destroy each other in so many ways, and they do, and they do it delightfully. I have to remind women all the time, stop it. Stop doing that. You're not helping yourself. When I was keynote speaker to a big national women's group, I thought if I never get to do this again, I'm going to inspire every single woman in that room to not complain about men and to stop pushing each other off the ladder. I just went to the jugular, because women do destroy each other, and I tell them to stop. Instead of focusing on what you don't have, focus on what's ahead and what you can have. What does it take to get there? It's hard, but it's amazing on the other side. The accomplishment is incredible.

The biggest opportunities in my field right now are in putting together legacy properties that require intent. We've turned down quite a lot, because to put together a legacy property requires real intent and purpose. When we put together a deal, we're employing people to construct things, to do the surveying and the engineering and all the things that are involved with bringing something to life. We know that we throw, ultimately, billions of dollars into the economy. That's what we do. We're focused on keeping America America and growing what we have and not squandering it. We know that there's a gift in it, and it does help other people.

The most important values to me are faith, resilience, and family. Through losing our daughter 33 years ago, we gained and grew faith that changed the trajectory of the way we approach things. That deep faith was infused into our family and has guided us ever since. I'm focused on raising the next generation of leaders, which is what I did with my 5 children who are all grown and extremely successful. To me, that really is the blessing. That's really the thing that I'm proudest of, because it's unusual, and there's no way to take it for granted. I also value truth and facts, which is why I studied journalism. I love the truth. I'm hell-bent and focused on keeping America America and growing what we have and not squandering it. We know that there's a gift in it, and it does help other people. I believe in focusing on what's ahead and what you can have rather than what you don't have. The accomplishment is incredible on the other side.