Heather Mena-Carias, MSML

I attribute a lot of my drive and success to my mom. Early on, seeing her battling MS - she went years being misdiagnosed, with doctors telling her she had lupus, severe depression, severe anxiety, all these things, until finally a neurologist confirmed she had multiple sclerosis. She goes through days where literally she can't feel her limbs, where she can't even stand up, where things are just really, really tough, and no matter what, she always has a smile on her face and is always trying to figure out ways to support, guide, and just uplift everybody. Even when she herself is at a very low point, she told us, no matter what goes on here, you have the full directive and the full ability to do everything. Don't stay behind for me. Always push yourself forward, and while you're pushing yourself forward, make sure you take others with you. It's much easier to push forward as a community, as a group, than it is just for one. When we were visiting college campuses and she was in a wheelchair, she told me she would never, ever keep me behind. She said I'm somebody that will always go forward, but if I'm able to come back for those that can't go with me at the rate that I can, that's okay, just don't lose sight of what the mission is. The mission is always to meet others and help others, and always leave them better than you found them. She taught me that our impact is not what we do - our impact with others is truly what happens to people when we do what we do. I would attribute all of that to my mom.

The best advice I’ve received is to always lead with curiosity—it opens doors to understanding, growth, and stronger connections. I also carry the reminder that “if you can’t be a bridge, be a light for others,” alongside my mother’s guidance to keep pushing forward and bring others with me along the way.

I would say, really lead a lot of the conversations through curiosity. A lot of times, we go into a lot of spaces with misconceptions, preconceived notions, all those things, and we're already kind of damaging the way that we're going through certain conversations, experiences, and ways of living. When we really change our mindset from leading with judgment, it really allows us to have full control of whatever experience we choose to move forward with. I know a lot of women want progress to happen overnight. Unfortunately, it's not going to be like that, and so the more we're able to just lead with that curiosity and want to support each other and really be collaborative, the better things will truly amount, rather than leading things with judgment, with anger, with resentment. It's much easier to just go through life with that sort of positive mindset and just let things be as they be, rather than restricting yourself. And then, if you can't be a bridge, be a light. I heard this from the Jefferson Fisher podcast - if you can't be a bridge, be a light for others. You're not always going to be able to bridge things for the other, and that's okay. You might not be able to reason with a certain person, but if you can't be a bridge for them, just be a light for them in some way, shape, or form. Help them, even if you don't get anything, because I think a lot of times with helping, we're like, what's the return that I'm going to get? There is just that ability to help people just to help them without having anything in return. The essence of just helping somebody can be the return. You're not always going to be able to be that bridge for somebody, but if you can at least be the light to help them in whatever trajectory they're trying to embark on, you're at least doing some good with that.

In higher education, when I review applications, I would always be super put off by how all these students are involved in Model UN, athletics, and various activities, but there was rarely ever a place for students who had all these high responsibilities at home to put things like cooking for their parents, cooking for siblings, working a job that's over 40 hours a week, or contributing to the household income. Something that the higher education sphere did this year is that they actually incorporated a section called the Responsibilities and Circumstances section, and I love that, because these students are able to finally get - I don't want to say credit - but they're able to put these things that they're doing that otherwise in previous years were probably not even considered because they had no idea where to put it. They had no idea where to put that they might not be a Model UN delegate, but they are at home literally raising their two younger siblings while their single mom is at work until 3 AM. We're going up there, but I genuinely look forward to the years where this is no longer a thing of like, wow - I look forward to a time where this can just be something that can just be appreciated for what it is, rather than, oh, we don't know how to have you outline this so the college understands and appreciates it.

The values most important in my work and personal life are community, service to others, empathy, cultural and emotional intelligence, curiosity, and grit.