Smiriti Shourie

I attribute my success to knowing myself early and trusting my creative strengths. Even when I was very young, in my 7th or 8th grade, I intuitively figured out my talents and my creative side. I kind of knew what my strengths were and what direction I was meant to go. I was never a bookworm or academic type - I was very involved in extracurriculars, and I tried everything to know what I was best at. I've never copied anyone, and I think that's been crucial because I've always been able to create my own path and build my own platform. My family was incredibly supportive in this journey. They were never the types who would say 'you gotta do this, you gotta do that.' They gave us the opportunity to practice what we liked and what we didn't like, and that clarified so much for me. They were very open and not controlling. When I was going through adolescence and that natural confusion phase, I could openly talk with my parents about everything. They never stopped me - they would present the good and the bad and let me make the decision. They never said 'we're not gonna let you do this because you're my daughter.' That really helped me understand and gauge what was right and wrong. That open perspective and family support was the biggest foundation for my success.

The best advice I ever received came from my time at a defense training - I went to Air Force training where they're very strict about discipline. One thing that really caught my eye was this: there's a Plan A, there's a Plan B, but there has to be a mandatory Plan C. And Plan C is the escape route. We all talk about Plan A and Plan B, but if you really don't know what your Plan C is, you can get stuck in situations you never anticipated. That taught me to be so proactive in my life that whatever I'm doing - whether it's work or anything else - I need to have some kind of plan where I know when I can make an exit. Because if something is toxic, you cannot be in that environment, whether it's work or personal. You just can't stay there. The other piece of advice that has been invaluable is to treat your mind like a switchboard - like an MCB board. You should be able to drill your mind in a way that you can cut the cords and switch on when you have to switch it on, and switch it off when you have to switch it off. Trust me, if you can do this, you will not run into mental health issues. So much of the stress people experience is because of lingering things and lingering environments. If somebody is talking and you don't want to listen, listen to half a sentence if it's good, and then switch it off. You don't have to listen to the other half if it's not for you. This applies to work-life balance too - if you bring your stressors from work home, or from home to work, it affects everything. I've been in workplaces where there's a lot of toxicity, where people have been in the same culture for the longest time, and they don't want to grow themselves and they don't want others to grow either. If I don't use that MCB board mentality, I would not be okay.

My advice is to follow your dreams and not copy people. I'm telling you, I have never copied anybody, and I think I've always been able to create a platform for myself because of that. I feel the moment we start copying peers, especially with the younger generation where everyone is looking at each other and thinking 'okay, they want to do this, I want to do this' - no. Let them do it. Create your own path. Ask yourself: Is that your passion? Is that something you're looking for? Is that something you're good at? If you're not, then you don't have to copy and be that person. The most important thing is knowing and learning more about yourself intuitively, because that's going to help you set up a platform for your own self, with your own passions and whatever your dreams are. I still tell people, even my own kids, that I've never copied anyone. Till this day, I've never copied people. Because as an artist, isn't that the point - for you to create from within? That's how you build something that's truly yours.

The biggest challenges are that in the banking world, we all know there are so many options out there, right? All the products are pretty much the same - it's just the way you position yourself that makes the difference. I think that's how I've been creating my own pipeline with clients, and I've been pretty successful at it. But yes, there can be objections and challenges because everybody shops around. The same is true with interiors, because we have so many interior designers and there's a lot of saturation in the market. But again, how you position yourself comes down to your own networking as well. People who've seen your work, they will come back to you and they will refer your name. So I would say the challenge is always there because the market does get saturated, and carving your own way and building your own path is the biggest challenge. It's never easy. But other than the work challenges, I think there are always so many life challenges going on that I take everything as a learning curve. I take it and I deal with it - I don't put it in the back pocket and ignore it.

For me personally, I believe in having an open perspective and creating strong bonds with my own people. The most valuable thing to me is the relationships and how you build them - it all depends on you and how you want to be. With my kids right now, I try to create that balance where I listen to them. I'm a listener, and obviously I'm a giver because I'm the mother, but I'm also a listener. I walk with them and I stand with them in everything. Family bonding and family support is a real value to me. You don't want to abandon your kids or anything. I'm a single mom because we're divorced, so my kids are pretty young and they're with their dad one week and one week with me. My message to their dad is the same thing - if you're with them, try to set an example and set that value so they have all the love, security, and support from you when they are with you, and they have the same thing with me. In my situation where we're separated, I have to create that security net for them. To me, that is a big value I'm giving to my kids right now. In general, even in my friendships, I don't like fake friendships. I'm very blunt. I value honesty, I value trust, and I am there - I've always been there. I have some friends, and I would say I make a lot of friends and I'm very interactive, but at the same time there are very few who have been there with me, who I went to school with, and we're still together. I think those are the ones who really know me and I know them, and we've tried to maintain that and we value it. We value our friendships. We're all in our mid-40s and late 40s and we're still together. You don't have to talk every day or see each other every day - everybody has a life - but we are there and we are there for each other.