Valerie Foster

A strong sense of curiosity. It keeps me sharp, alive, and relevant. That has led to life-long learning and my most poignant moments of success - those little moments when individuals share with me what they gained from reading my writings. For example, I once had a parent who read my book about eating disorders, and she said she has a teenage son and they don't have this problem, but she got so much out of my book on how to have good communication with her child. Those unsolicited encounters, when someone shares what they gained, are what make me feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing. We're all influencers, whether we realize it or not, and it's a tremendous satisfaction when we use it in positive ways.

The first came from my parents: "Finish college." It set my course on one that opened up unlimited opportunities. The second, from Joseph Campbell, professor of Comparative Mythology, whose book, The Power of Myth, upended my thinking tremendously. As he said, "The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty 'yes' to your adventure." I practice saying, "Yes," when given opportunities and challenges.

I would be honest that the field of writing is such a hard path to take, certainly in terms of getting published. I've been very lucky to have had two traditional publishers for each of my books. But I've always been sort of a Pollyanna in believing that what you feel you're here to do, you have to at least explore it. So it goes back to the question:: what if I'm scared? And I'd say, do it anyway. There's nothing much more terrifying for me than having a book about to be released, which I do on July 9th, and it's very emotional, but it's terrifying. So I would say that whatever you do, do it for the right reasons, and do it the very, very best you can. And trust that everything else will fall into place. Sometimes you have to change your mind; life hands you all kinds of surprises, so you have to be practical. My daughter has carved out a life as a writer. She still has to have a day job, but she's pursuing what she feels she was molded to do. I think more women need that encouragement. If this is for you, don't let anyone else get in your way. All women need that sense of purpose and empowerment. Are you doing it for the right reasons? But I wouldn't tell them what that is; they have to decide that for themselves.

I try to stay present in my time and place, and that means I accept the advent of AI. It has a contributory place in our society. However, not in replacing the human voice and spirit. It now threatens creativity and authenticity in all areas of communication and it saddens me. And yet, I already see our culture responding with a new sense of value put on HUMAN. For example, my publisher adds a seal on our frontispiece title pages: Human Authored. So our biggest challenge is our biggest opportunity: to promote, recognize, and sometimes insist on human-centered and originated work!

I really believe in having meaningful, substantial conversations rather than superficial ones. My friendship with Helen Handler, the Holocaust survivor, taught me so much about how to have rich conversations, which oftentimes women don't get a chance to have or are afraid to use their voice. In my book about her, it's just two women who sit for coffee and pastry every week and have deep conversations, and I ask the big questions, and see where that takes us. That taught me a lot about having substantial conversations. I don't want to waste the time I have, and so I want my interactions to be meaningful. Every bit of time we spend should be purposeful, even if the purpose is just to have fun; it could just be a lightness of enjoying something. It's not that I'm a big heavy traveler through life, but I just don't want to waste time. I'm very aware that we're all influencing everyone in our days, and I try not to squander that role in being able to, in little or big ways, mentor other people, often just through my own sense of self and my own role-modeling. I hope to gain the same from them.