Applied Improv for Negotiators!
Master the art of saying "Yes, And" to transform your negotiation outcomes through improvisational theater techniques.
Applied Improv for Negotiators!
Week 1: Game Rules and Principles
Any game worth playing—like negotiation—is highly social and requires clarity about the rules and assumptions that guide it. Creating something new, sharing limited resources, and solving problems are all negotiation games that we play several times a day, both at work and at home.
Whether consciously or unconsciously, negotiators often assume they are playing either a game of raw competition or one of creativity and shared vitality.
Since beginning my study and practice of Applied Improv methods three years ago, I have become inspired by how these principles, tools, and practices can help negotiators. The use of Applied Improv principles and mindsets from improvisational theater in non-theatrical settings can lead to increased satisfaction and more sustainable results.
Applied Improv game rules encourage participants to put themselves in someone else's shoes and see situations from another person's perspective. This increases the empathy required to create meaningful and relevant negotiation outcomes. Understanding another person's thoughts and feelings builds stronger social connections and enhances the ability to respond appropriately during negotiations.
For example, one of the foundational practices of Applied Improv is the "Yes, And" communication technique. "Yes" does not mean agreement. However, using "Yes, And" rather than "No" or "But" often results in greater:
- Acceptance
- Openness
- Appreciation
- Acknowledgment
- Encouragement
- Respect
- Honor
Empathizing with and listening to others increases our ability to regulate our own emotions and promotes creative thinking in uncertain situations.
Simply being open to learning about people and their experiences is a powerful way to strengthen our capacity for empathy. Applied Improv's principles of nonjudgment help us become more curious, ask better questions, and remain open to the possibility of finding common ground.
Applied Improv game rules foster an environment of curiosity, listening, acceptance, spontaneity, flexibility, and personal presence. The combination of structure and spontaneity creates a balance between freedom and discipline.
Our human nervous systems often become overwhelmed when faced with situations involving limited resources and few options. This balance of freedom and structure can help calm the nervous system, create a sense of safety and comfort, and support creative problem-solving in what are often high-risk situations.
This enables negotiators to maintain a strong sense of self while remaining realistic about the changes they can influence. Empathy skills involve understanding another person's situation, even if we do not personally identify with it. Unlike theatrical improv, Applied Improv games are not about being funny. Instead, they emphasize nonjudgment, experimentation, and rewarding effort through the following principles:
- Make Your Partner(s) Look Good
- Listen!
- Notice More
- Let Go
- Accept and Build on Offers
- Embrace Uncertainty
- Co-Create by Leading and Following
- Practice Short Turn-Taking
Recommended Practice
Ask a friend, partner, or coworker to play the "Yes, And" game with you for three rounds.
Round 1
You begin with a declarative statement, such as:
"We should go on vacation to Hawaii."
Your partner responds with "No" and a rebuttal:
"No, we should go to Italy."
Continue going back and forth at least four times.
Round 2
Your counterpart begins with a declarative statement, such as:
"We should go on vacation to Croatia."
You respond with:
"Yes, but Thailand would be better because we haven't been to Asia."
Explain why your idea is better and continue the exchange for at least four rounds.
Round 3
You begin with a declarative statement, such as:
"We should go on vacation to New York City."
Your counterpart responds with:
"Yes, and what I like about that is that New York City has a lot to offer, so we could brainstorm activities that we would both enjoy."
Continue building on each other's ideas for at least four rounds.
Debrief
After completing the exercise, discuss the following questions with your counterpart:
- What did you notice about yourself during each round? Did your breathing change? What were you thinking about yourself and your counterpart throughout the exercise?
- Where do you see this game being played out in your current negotiations at home, work, or school?
- Where can you replace the game of "No" and "But" with "Yes, And"? Why might that help you become more engaged and satisfied in your next negotiation?
Let me know what you experience!
