Becoming Me
Finding Light in the Darkest Moments: A Journey of Grief, Survival, and Self-Discovery
Life Throws Some Heavy Curveballs
Life throws some heavy curveballs that you don't see coming.
My life was a field of dreams, as I was raised in such a powerful, motivating family.
Home was laughter, joy, and a safe haven for expressing ourselves, learning to be good stewards of our faith, and knowing that all things work for good, as the Good Book taught us.
Summers were about eating cold watermelon, family gatherings, and vacations.
Spring was about planting beautiful flowers, watering them, and watching them grow.
Fall was about leaves turning, raking leaves with family, having fun, and making pumpkin pie.
Winters were about planning to gather up wood for fires and buying clothing and food for those in need, as well as making hot gumbo.
A new year was for planning, throwing out the old, bringing in the new, and growing and creating higher goals for our happy family. We were simply grateful that another safe year had rolled around, where growing older meant becoming wiser.
These are the gifts of a simple and well-deserved life of hard work and grace.
But what happens when the least expected thing happens, and no one could ever be prepared for it? What happens when you are living a strong, wonderful life, planning a future for your family, and working toward your most cherished goals, and one morning, your child doesn't wake up?
This is the first time I can tell this story after four years.
The entire world slips away from under your feet, and your happy, joyful family becomes numb, with no smiles and only the shock of, "How did this happen to you? How did this happen to your family?"
Life changes for everyone, and everyone is left speechless. No more summers to plant flowers and have fun with pumpkins in the fall. Summer vacations are no longer, and holidays are just a day to sleep.
The world is turned upside down, and careers are forgotten as sadness takes over joy, peace, and happiness.
That's when I disappeared from everything and lost all of me.
It has been, and is, the worst moment in life, where no words can explain the why.
Losing myself completely and finding my journey back to me took courage and faith, with minutes and days becoming one and seemingly unimportant. Until, bit by bit, I wrote myself back into the living. I started to discover that I was alive and, somehow, had to find and become me again for my daughter, to keep her alive.
This new me now wants to help others discover their journey back to themselves—a true story of self-love and survival.
