From Misfit to Fitting In
How a Weekend Retreat and Therapy Changed My Life Forever
As someone who grew up with almost no self-esteem, I knew that something had to change, or I would never find true happiness in my life. It wasn't until I attended a weekend retreat for incoming college freshmen, which included testing for both intellectual and psychological components, that I realized my life could be different.
After two full days of group sessions and individual testing, we each met one-on-one with a psychologist.
The first thing I was told was that I needed psychological counseling. It felt like the sky opened up and the black cloud over my head disappeared, letting the sun shine down on me. For the first time, I felt hope that my life could be better. What followed was four months of twice-weekly psychological counseling, which set the wheels in motion for me to become the strong, confident woman I am today.
Within a week of my arrival on campus, I had the opportunity to put what I learned in therapy to the test. That first weekend, a friend from my hometown took me to a coffeehouse to listen to live music. I enjoyed it and went back during the week to hear more music. Much to my chagrin, the coffeehouse had no music playing, and it was empty except for one table where 8–10 people were sitting around, having a lively conversation.
I immediately realized I had two choices. I could either turn around and walk out, risking being thought weird by people who didn't even know me and thereby causing myself great embarrassment, or I could sit down with them and do what my therapist had suggested: "act as if." Act as if I were a likable person. I took a deep breath and sat down with them.
In a short time, I became one of them. We laughed, we joked, and we shared stories. It turned out I WAS a likable person. That was many decades ago, but it set me on a new course in my life.
What I realized from this was that once you know what you need, you should be open to receiving it. And, as author Paulo Coelho wrote, "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it."
MarceyG is a professional speaker and empowerment advocate from Urbana-Champaign inspiring personal transformation and authentic self-discovery. With a background as Director of Operations at UIUC Hillel and a decade-long career as a top Pure Romance Consultant, MarceyG now focuses on motivational speaking, podcasting, and writing. She holds a Bachelor's in Liberal Arts from UIUC and guides audiences through…
