No Regrets, Not Even One
How a Single Mother's Life Experiences Became Her Greatest Gift
Influence Comes in Many Forms
When I first discovered the Influential Women website, I didn't consider myself a candidate for that title.
To me, influential women were successful, highly educated businesswomen who had made significant strides in their careers—the kind of women I had worked for (and with) throughout my career as an Executive Assistant.
As I began reading the articles, my initial impression seemed to be confirmed. These women were accomplished in their fields and possessed a wealth of knowledge they could use to mentor those just beginning their own careers.
But then I found myself wondering:
What if I could still influence someone through my life experiences, even without a college degree? What if spending nearly thirty years in the same profession didn't make my story any less valuable?
What I Lack in Credentials, I Make Up for in Life Experience
I have been the mother of three children for more than thirty years, and for twenty-three of those years, I was a single mom.
During that time, I worked full-time while raising my children and caring for my mother, who has Alzheimer's disease.
I navigated it all without a partner.
Along the way, I experienced divorce, workplace sexual harassment, job loss, difficult family dynamics, menopause, and financial hardship.
But I also experienced some of the happiest and most fulfilling moments of my life.
The path I chose—to do it on my own—was just one of many I could have taken.
I don't believe any of those paths would have been easy.
That's simply what life is.
Now That My Children Are Grown
Now that my children are grown, I've reached a season of life where I can once again turn toward my own interests and passions.
Over the past few years, I've started doing things I've always wanted to try.
I've always loved writing. I've written blogs and published a few articles, but now I finally have the time to truly enjoy the creative things I love.
I've taken a painting class.
I've learned mosaic art and begun creating my own pieces.
I've spent time decorating my home in creative ways.
I'm genuinely enjoying this chapter of my life.
One Regret I Never Wanted to Repeat
One regret I carried for years was that when my grandfather passed away, everything happened so quickly that I never had the chance to tell him how much he meant to me.
We were incredibly close, yet we never took the time to say the things that mattered most.
I never wanted that to happen again.
As I found more time to pursue creative projects, I decided to create something meaningful—a workbook that helps people express their love and appreciation to someone while they still have the opportunity.
The workbook is called While You're Still Here: A Book About Connection in the Time We Have.
Although I haven't sold many copies, I've been surprised by how often I've met someone who was facing the impending loss of a loved one.
Many times, I've simply given them a copy.
Knowing that my little book has helped people have conversations they might otherwise never have had brings me tremendous joy.
It reminds me that even small acts can make a lasting difference.
My mother is now in hospice with Alzheimer's disease, and she rarely remembers who I am anymore.
But before her memories faded completely, I filled out the workbook and gave it to her.
The next day, I visited her and found her sitting quietly, reading it with tears in her eyes.
She looked at me and said,
"I wish everyone could receive a book like this from someone they love."
That day, we shared feelings we might never have spoken aloud otherwise.
Because of that book, we were able to tell each other what truly mattered.
Even after her memories faded, she kept the book beside her bed.
Somehow, she still knows it is one of her most treasured possessions.
What Influence Really Means
So yes, I do believe that, in my own way, I am influential.
Not because of a title.
Not because of a degree.
But because through love, loss, resilience, and compassion, I've been able to help others cherish the time they still have with the people they love.
I've come through life's challenges with valuable lessons, unforgettable memories...
And, perhaps most importantly, with no regrets.
