Say the “But” Out Loud
Learning to question the beliefs that hold us back.
Say the "But" Out Loud
I've started paying attention to one little word:
But.
- "I want to go back to school, but…"
- "I know I'm capable, but…"
- "I'd love to try, but…"
- "I'm exhausted, but everyone needs me."
I've said my share of them.
And somewhere along the way, I realized my "buts" weren't always facts. Sometimes they were fear, guilt, expectations, or old beliefs dressed up as perfectly reasonable explanations.
That made me think about the things we carry.
Some burdens are real. Responsibilities don't disappear because we decide to think positively. Families need us. Careers require something from us. Life comes with limitations.
But sometimes the heaviest part isn't the responsibility itself. It's the meaning we attach to putting it down.
But they need me.
But I'll disappoint someone.
But I should be able to handle this.
But what if I fail?
That's why I believe in saying the "but" out loud.
Once I hear it, I can ask: Is this a fact, a responsibility, a fear—or simply a belief I've carried for so long that I stopped questioning it?
No buts allowed doesn't mean pretending obstacles don't exist. It means they don't automatically get veto power over what happens next.
Maybe that's part of why I keep pushing myself to grow, learn, write, lead, and occasionally do things before I feel completely ready.
My life hasn't been built without "buts."
I've built it by learning which ones deserve my attention—and which ones need to get out of my way.
So say the "but" out loud.
Hear it. Question it. Respect it when it's real. Challenge it when it isn't.
Your "but" may explain what's holding you back. It doesn't have to decide where you go next.
Still learning. Still questioning. Probably overthinking it.
— KDS
