THE PATH YOU DIDN'T CHOOSE: How Limiting Beliefs Get Stuck in Your Nervous System
Breaking Free From Inherited Limiting Beliefs: Why Your Body Holds the Key Your Mind Can't Unlock
There's a highway most of us have been on for years. The one with the green sign that reads: "DO NOT STOP. YOU'RE NOT ENOUGH. WHAT YOU THINK DOESN'T MATTER. YOU ARE WORTHLESS.” Or enter your own limiting beliefs.
You know what? We didn't choose that highway. We inherited it from parents doing their best, from a culture obsessed with productivity, from a nervous system that learned early: stay small, stay quiet, stay compliant. That's how you stay safe.
So we keep going, we push through the exhaustion, the disconnection, the nagging feeling that something's fundamentally wrong. We tell ourselves it's just us, it’s just the way I am. I have to live with it.
THE STUCK ENERGY PROBLEM
Here's what I spent years not understanding: I had limiting beliefs lodged in my body, not just my brain.
I have done talk therapy (which was amazingly useful- don’t get me wrong, I’m eternally grateful for my therapists helping me through some of the most traumatic times of my life). What I noticed though, was that all of the things I had worked on, kept resurfacing in different ways. I'd make progress—real progress—and then something would trigger me, and I'd revert right back. Same exhaustion (you know the one, like you’re walking against the current in the lazy river). Same trapped feeling. Same sense that I wasn't enough and that I’ll never be authentically me.
Here’s the problem: all that positive thinking was happening in my head while my body was still running old survival programs. I was trying to think my way out of patterns my nervous system refused to budge on.
I endured crisis after crisis. My divorce, my house being broken into, my car being totaled, my dad falling and having severe brain trauma, COVID, the stress of taking care of both of my parents when things really got hard. Then came my father's death, my husband's mystery illness, my dog's cancer diagnosis, my kids navigating their own life stresses, struggles and achievements. Through it all, I was trying to be the fixer. Trying to be the one holding it together, doing all the right things, making all the right plans for everyone else. The one who felt guilty for not being able to keep up with my photography business, meal plan, cook for my family, keep up appearances.
I looked fine on the outside. I over-functioned. Showed up for everyone else. But inside? I quit on myself. I let go of my photography and business, turned my head away from my love of cooking, I gave up trying to keep up.
And I thought the problem was my mindset.
THE THING NOBODY TELLS YOU
Your mind can heal while your body stays stuck.
Think about that for a second. One body. Two very different systems doing different things with the same data.
The limiting beliefs we carry—"I'm not enough," "my needs don't matter," "I have to earn my worth"—aren't just thoughts floating around in your head. They're encoded in your nervous system. They live in your body as tension, tight shoulders, a scaffolding to keep you safe and not crumble inside. To survive.
When your nervous system is stuck in survival mode, no amount of positive thinking will set you free. You can't think your way out of a nervous system problem. That's just not how the body works.
WHAT ACTUALLY CHANGED
I finally understood: the stuck energy in my body was what needed to be released to finally release the limiting beliefs for real.
Not more positive thinking. Not another mindset shift. But actual nervous system regulation—work that happened in my body.
When I started working with my nervous system instead of against it, everything shifted. The energy came back. The guilt softened. I could take action for myself without shame, rest without feeling lazy. I could believe in myself again, believe in my vision for my life and my family.
It wasn't magic. It was somatic work. It was learning to listen to what my body was actually telling me instead of overriding it with enduring willpower.
WHAT THIS LOOKS LIKE
Releasing stuck energy means:
- Tuning in instead of pushing through – Actually noticing what your body needs before you run yourself into the ground
- Honoring your own pace – Stopping the forced march and moving at a speed your nervous system can actually handle
- Trusting your body's wisdom – Recognizing that your gut knows things your brain hasn't figured out yet
- Creating actual safety – Building new patterns that feel aligned with who you are, not who you think you should be
This is somatic coaching. This is nervous system regulation. This is the bridge between understanding your patterns intellectually and actually feeling different in your body.
THE REAL TALK
If you're on that highway right now, here's what I know: the sign isn't the truth. It's just a direction. And you have way more agency than you think to change your direction.
You don't have to keep running on that cement path. You never did.
If your nervous system has been stuck in survival mode for a long time, it might need some support learning a different way. That's where somatic coaching comes in—to help you release what's been stuck and reconnect with the wisdom that's always been there.
The path back to yourself starts with one thing: listening to your body instead of overriding it.
Your nervous system isn't broken. It just needs to know it's safe to come home.
