When Someone Says You Can’t
How Resistance Refines Leadership and Reveals Your True Calling
Some of the most defining moments in leadership are born not from affirmation, but from resistance. When someone says you can’t, it can either quiet your voice or sharpen it. For leaders grounded in faith, purpose, and integrity, “you can’t” is often the moment where leadership is refined, courage is tested, and calling becomes undeniable.
Every leader—regardless of industry, title, or experience—encounters this moment. It may come as a closed door, a delayed opportunity, an unreturned call, or a quiet dismissal of a vision that matters deeply. Often, it is not delivered with cruelty, but with caution, doubt, or convenience. Yet its impact can feel personal. How leaders respond in that moment determines not only what they build, but who they become.
Leadership is rarely shaped in seasons of ease. It is forged in moments where conviction must stand without applause. When someone says you can’t, they may believe they are defining a limitation. In reality, they are often revealing a crossroads—one that forces leaders to choose between retreat and resolve.
“When someone says you can’t, it is often the moment leadership is refined, not rejected.”
For current leaders, this moment is familiar. The responsibility to lead—especially in complex environments—often brings resistance from systems that prefer the familiar over the transformative. Business leaders know that innovation frequently challenges comfort. Purpose-driven leadership asks harder questions and demands higher accountability. The temptation in those moments is to soften the vision or abandon it altogether. Yet the leaders who endure are those who remain anchored in integrity and focused on impact rather than approval.
Emerging and aspiring leaders often experience “you can’t” earlier and more frequently. It can sound like you’re too new, not yet, or not the right fit. For women in leadership, it may be spoken through lowered expectations, limited access, or unspoken assumptions. These moments can easily be mistaken as signals to stop. In truth, they are often invitations to clarify purpose, deepen preparation, and strengthen resolve.
My own leadership journey has included these moments—times when progress felt delayed, support was absent, or the vision ahead seemed too large for the space I was given. It was in those moments that faith became more than belief; it became foundation. Faith provided clarity when answers were scarce and courage when the path forward required persistence rather than permission.
As the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Pnězs Change for Conquering Cancer (PC³), I have learned that leadership rooted in purpose does not wait for consensus before serving. PC³ was built on the conviction that no child should fight alone. That conviction demanded action, even when resources were limited and the road ahead uncertain. While PC³ exists within the nonprofit space, the lesson transcends sector: leadership does not begin when conditions are ideal—it begins when commitment is unwavering.
For the broader business world, moments of resistance often precede the most meaningful growth. Markets shift, strategies are questioned, and leaders are tested under pressure. Those who view resistance as failure miss its value. Those who see it as refinement gain resilience, clarity, and the ability to execute with purpose. Organizations led by individuals who persevere through resistance often emerge stronger, more aligned, and better prepared for long-term impact.
Leading when someone says you can’t requires humility and courage. It requires listening without surrendering conviction, adapting without abandoning values, and moving forward even when validation lags behind effort. It is not about proving others wrong—it is about remaining faithful to the work you are called to do.
For aspiring leaders, remember this: being told you can’t is not a verdict on your ability. It is often a reflection of someone else’s limitations, timing, or perspective. Leadership matures when you learn to discern which voices to heed and which moments require quiet persistence rather than public resistance.
