You Don't Have to Lose Yourself to Chase Your Dream: A Different Take on “Work–Life Balance”
Why work-life balance isn't the enemy of ambition—it's the foundation of building a dream that actually lasts.
Every so often, a quote makes the rounds on LinkedIn that stops me in my tracks. Recently, it was this one:
“Work–life balance is for those chasing someone else’s dream.”
I understand what it’s trying to say — hustle, grind, sacrifice, build.
But here’s the truth: I completely disagree with it.
Because after living through three RIFs, navigating economic uncertainty that rattled entire industries, rebuilding my confidence more than once, and ultimately choosing to bet on myself as an HR consultant…
I’ve learned that work–life balance isn’t the enemy of ambition — it’s the foundation of it.
What Three RIFs Taught Me About “Dreams”
RIF #1 shook me.
RIF #2 reshaped me.
RIF #3 made me unrecognizable… in the best possible way.
Each one forced me to confront something uncomfortable: I was pouring my talent, energy, and heart into organizations that could — and did — change direction overnight. Not because of my performance. Not because of my value. But simply because business conditions shifted.
And it made me rethink the idea that only the sleepless, boundaryless, self-sacrificing employees are the ones “chasing dreams.”
Because the truth is, I was chasing someone else’s.
Designing a Life Instead of Waiting for Someone to Approve It
Starting HighBar HR Advisors was not just a career move — it was a reclamation.
My dream wasn’t to burn out.
My dream wasn’t to constantly brace for the next workforce reduction.
My dream wasn’t to lose myself in the name of proving my worth.
My dream was — and still is — to serve people, uplift small businesses, solve real HR problems, and create a life with room to breathe.
A life where I could:
- Work with integrity,
- Use my HR leadership experience to help others build healthier workplaces,
- Set boundaries that protect my energy,
- Choose clients who value partnership,
- Build something meaningful and sustainable.
Balance isn’t an obstacle. Balance is a strategy. Balance is autonomy.
And honestly? Balance is part of the dream.
Ambition Without Burnout: The New Model
I’ve spent my entire HR career supporting people through their best moments and their worst — onboarding days, promotions, conflicts, investigations, layoffs, and everything in between.
The common thread?
People want to feel safe.
People want to feel grounded.
People want to feel like their contribution matters.
So why on earth would we glorify a “dream” that requires people to abandon themselves?
The most resilient organizations — especially in uncertain economic cycles — are led by people who aren’t running on fumes. They’re clear-headed, balanced, values-driven, and thoughtful.
The same is true for entrepreneurs.
You simply can’t serve others well if you’re running on empty.
Rewriting the Story
Maybe the quote should say:
“Work–life balance is for those who want their dreams to last.”
Because chasing your dream doesn’t have to look like exhaustion, constant overwork, or sacrificing your mental health.
It can look like clarity.
It can look like purpose.
It can look like service.
It can look like rebuilding after setbacks with stronger boundaries and higher standards.
And for me, it looks like building a consulting business rooted in partnership, trust, and the intentional design of a life I actually want to live.
For Anyone Rebuilding After a RIF or a Toxic Role
Let me say this clearly: You didn’t deserve what happened. And you don’t have to hustle yourself into the ground to “make up for it.”
Your healing counts.
Your boundaries count.
Your balance counts.
Your well-being counts.
You can chase your dream and design a life that honors you.
In fact — that’s the most powerful dream of all.
