Nichole Carminati

The plague of defeatist language that touches all areas of life is often hidden in polite, noncommittal dialogue intended to discourage ideas. I hear these conversations daily. They happen at community meetings when newcomers try to offer their lived experience and insight into ongoing problems. I hear them at political gatherings and in my personal life. I have often struggled to understand why people would rather offer a polite “do not waste your time” instead of a welcoming, encouraging reply.

There are always a million reasons why new ideas may fail—and they may indeed be a waste of time. In 2026, it appears time is one of the most precious resources we have, and not a single person I know is willing to waste a moment of it. Somewhere between overly enthusiastic implementation of new policies and practices launched prematurely, and a flat-out “no, thank you,” there is a sweet spot where hope and ideas can grow. This is also the place where the phrase “Well, the problem with that is…” kills ideas before they have a chance to breathe.

I am an elder millennial who, like many others, is balancing mental and physical health alongside a professional career. I have found that the comedy improv principle of “Yes! And…” breathes new life into my side quests and personal spiritual development. Some of the most enriching experiences of my life have come from embracing this approach.

Through “Yes! And…” moments, I have found myself in rooms with community leaders, CEOs of Fortune 100 companies, politicians, nuns, and rabbis. During one of these experiences, I met an astounding woman—Brig. Gen. (Ret.) Rhonda Cornum. She spoke at an event I attended and shared her story as a combat physician and prisoner of war. She spoke of her military service, her time as a POW, her faith, her role as a wife and mother, and her expansive career—one that is both admirable and inspiring. When I asked if she had any life advice to share, she said that what worked for her was never letting an opportunity walk past her.

I related to that on a visceral level.

I have found myself in a variety of unexpected roles and places throughout my life—roles some may have argued I did not have the expertise to fill. Nonetheless, I am not afraid to fail. Failure is inevitable. It happens to all of us—some more publicly than others. Remembering this matters, because when we encounter polite defeatist language in response to new ideas, we can choose to offer a counter-response—one that breathes hope back into ideas when they warrant it.

As leaders, we have a duty to encourage the growth of the generations stepping into new roles. We have a duty to remember to live our own hopes and dreams. And we have a duty to try to be better than we were the day before.

Life is lived out loud and in person. It is not lived by aimlessly scrolling and absorbing the lives of others. Life is meant to be lived today, tomorrow, and always—until our ticket is punched. Say yes more often. The adventure of life cannot begin until we consent with a yes.

In the words of Hunter S. Thompson: “Buy the ticket. Take the ride.”