Paige Hadziselimovic, M.Ed.

For most of my life, I believed that being an educator was my calling. Not just a job, not just a profession-a purpose. I poured my energy, creativity, and heart into my work. As a principal, I led a school doing innovative, student-centered things that made me proud to wake up every morning. I was building something meaningful. I was serving students in ways that felt deeply aligned with who I was.

Then everything changed.

In the same season that I suddenly lost my dad to a stroke, I was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder. The grief was already unbearable. But when doctors told me that the physical demands and chronic stress of my career were no longer conducive to my long-term health, it felt like the ground disappeared beneath me.

I wasn't just losing a job.

I was losing the identity I had spent my entire adult life building.

Who was I without my work?

Who was I if I wasn't answering the call to be an educator in the way I always had?

I had unknowingly absorbed the messages society sends women:

You are worthy when you are useful.

You are valuable because of what you do.

Your identity is tied to your productivity, your service, your output.

So when my body changed-and my career had to change with it-I felt like I was disappearing.

But here's the truth I learned the hard way:

Losing your career does not mean losing your identity.

In fact, sometimes losing your first career is the very thing that reveals who you truly are.

The Journey Back to Myself

Recovery forced me to slow down. To listen inward. To question the beliefs I had carried for years. And in that quiet, I discovered something I had never given myself permission to believe:

I am worthy because of who I am, not what I do.

My value wasn't rooted in my job title, my accomplishments, or my ability to push through exhaustion. My worth was rooted in my humanity-my authenticity, my creativity, my inner peace, my love for family, and my ability to find humor even in the hardest moments.

Those values became my compass.

As my mindset shifted, I realized that my calling hadn't disappeared-it had simply evolved. I still cared deeply about students, families, and the transformative power of education. But I needed a career that honored my physical, mental, and emotional needs. One that allowed me to serve without sacrificing myself.

So I built one.

Finding Purpose in a New Chapter

Founding my own business wasn't just a professional decision-it was an act of self-preservation and self-respect. It allowed me to continue supporting students and clients, but in a way that gave me freedom, balance, and holistic care.

I created a career that aligned with my core values:

• Authenticity - showing up as my whole self
• Creativity - designing solutions, content, and experiences that feel alive
• Inner Peace - choosing work that doesn't harm my health
• Family - prioritizing the people who matter most
• Humor - keeping joy at the center of my life

In losing my first career, I found a path that better suits my life and empowers my purpose. Not because my work as a public educator wasn't meaningful-it absolutely was. But because my life changed, and I allowed my purpose to grow with me.

If You're Facing a Career Loss, Here's What I Want You to Know

Losing a career-whether by choice, circumstance, illness, burnout, or life transition-can feel like losing a piece of yourself. It's disorienting. It's painful. It's scary.

But it is not the end of your story.

Your identity is not your job.

Your worth is not your productivity.

Your purpose is not confined to one career path.

Sometimes the life you're meant to live is waiting on the other side of a door you never wanted to walk through.

I didn't choose my diagnosis. I didn't choose the grief of losing my dad. I didn't choose to leave the career I loved.

But I did choose to rebuild.

I did choose to redefine my identity.

I did choose to create a life that honors all parts of me.

And you can, too.

Whether you are a high school junior building a college list, a college senior staring down graduation, or a young adult a few years into the workforce wondering why something feels off-the most powerful place to start is the same for all of you.

Not a job board. Not a salary calculator. Not a list of "hot careers for the next decade."

It is a clear understanding of your core values: the beliefs, priorities, and motivations that shape what feels meaningful, fulfilling, and non-negotiable in your life and work.

Research from university career centers consistently shows that aligning decisions with personal values leads to greater long-term satisfaction, stronger motivation, and lower burnout risk. Values act as an internal compass-one that helps you choose environments, roles, and paths where you can genuinely thrive.

Here is a deeper look at why clarifying core values is a foundational step-whether you are just starting out or recalibrating after a few years in the real world.

Values Create Alignment Between Who You Are and What You Pursue

Career research emphasizes that values are a central pillar of decision-making-just as important as interests and skills. When you choose a major, a job, or an industry that reflects your values (creativity, integrity, social impact, independence, stability, for example), you are far more likely to experience purpose and satisfaction in your work.

This is true at 17 and equally true at 24.

For students, that alignment shows up in essays, interviews, and supplemental responses. A student who understands their values can articulate why a particular major, campus culture, or academic program resonates with them-in ways that a list of achievements simply cannot.

For young adults already in the workforce, alignment shows up in day-to-day energy. When your work reflects what you value, Monday mornings feel different. When it does not, no amount of salary or prestige fully compensates.

Values Prevent Burnout and Misaligned Pathways

A mismatch between daily work and personal beliefs is one of the biggest drivers of early-career dissatisfaction. Graduates who enter roles that conflict with their values experience significantly higher turnover and disengagement-often within the first two years.

Sound familiar? You are not alone, and it is not a character flaw. It is usually a values mismatch that nobody helped you identify before you accepted the offer.

Students who clarify their values early avoid choosing majors or career paths based solely on external pressure-prestige, salary, or what their peers are doing. Young adults who do this work after the fact gain something equally valuable: the language to understand what went wrong and the clarity to make a better next move.

This matters even more for those who feel pulled in multiple directions by family expectations or cultural norms. Knowing your values does not mean ignoring those voices-it means you can have an honest, grounded conversation about what you need in order to succeed.

Values Strengthen Your Story-In Essays and Interviews

Whether you are writing a college application essay or preparing for a job interview, the question underneath every prompt is the same: Who are you, and why does it matter?

Values are the answer.

For college applicants, values help you:

• Identify meaningful experiences worth writing about-not just impressive ones
• Explain leadership, service, or academic interests with depth-the why, not just the what
• Craft a compelling "why this major" or "why this college" narrative that feels genuine
• Demonstrate maturity, reflection, and purpose-qualities every admissions reader is looking for

For young adults in job searches or career transitions, values help you:

• Answer "tell me about yourself" with real substance instead of a rehearsed résumé recap
• Explain a career pivot in a way that sounds intentional, not reactive
• Identify companies and teams worth pursuing-not just roles that look good on paper
• Negotiate with confidence because you know what trade-offs you are and are not willing to make

In both contexts, values are the why behind your story. And people respond strongly to someone who can articulate that why.

Values Guide You Toward the Right Environment

College is more than academics-it is a four-year ecosystem of community, culture, expectations, and opportunities. A job is more than a title-it is a daily environment that either supports or drains you.

When you know your values, you can evaluate whether a campus or a workplace actually aligns with what you need to thrive.

For example:

• Someone who values collaboration may prefer project-based programs or team-oriented work cultures
• Someone who values independence may seek flexible curricula or roles with significant autonomy
• Someone who values social impact may gravitate toward mission-driven organizations or service-oriented institutions
• Someone who values creativity may prioritize environments where new ideas are welcomed, not just tolerated
• Someone who values stability may weigh job security and clear advancement paths more heavily than prestige

This is why values are central to building a balanced college list-and equally central to building a job search strategy that does not leave you exhausted and disappointed.

What Happens When You Skip This Step

Here is what the career search often looks like without values clarity:

You apply to roles that sound impressive. You get an offer. You take it because it seems like the right move. Six months in, something feels off-but you cannot quite name it. A year in, you are quietly updating your résumé again.

This cycle is incredibly common among young adults in their 20s, and it is almost never about the job itself. It is about the mismatch between the role and what the person actually needed from their work.

Values clarification does not guarantee a perfect path. But it gives you a filter-one that helps you ask better questions, spot red flags earlier, and make decisions you can actually stand behind.

So, How Do You Actually Identify Your Core Values?

Values clarification is not a one-time quiz. It is a reflective process. A few approaches that work well:

Reflect on peak experiences. Think about a time you felt genuinely proud, energized, or deeply satisfied-in school, at work, or in life. What was happening? What made it meaningful? The answers often point directly to values.

Notice what frustrates you. Frustration is frequently a signal that a value is being violated. If you feel drained by a certain environment or task, ask yourself what is missing.

Look at your choices, not your intentions. Where do you actually spend your time and energy? What do you protect, even when it is inconvenient? Your behavior reveals your values more honestly than any list you write down.

Use structured assessments. Tools like the Values in Action (VIA) survey, the CliftonStrengths assessment, or a guided values card sort can help surface priorities you might not have named on your own.

Talk it through. Sometimes the clearest insights come from a conversation-with a counselor, a mentor, or someone who knows you well and will ask honest questions.

At Ivy & Ember, values exploration is woven into how we work with every student and young adult we serve. Whether we are building a college list, drafting an essay, or mapping out a career path after graduation, we start by understanding what actually matters to you-not what looks good on paper.

The Bottom Line

Choosing a college or career without knowing your values is a little like packing for a trip without knowing the destination. You might end up somewhere fine. But you might also find yourself underdressed, overprepared for the wrong things, and wondering how you got there.

Values give you direction, language, and confidence. They make the college search-and the career search-feel less like a guessing game and more like a process of genuine self-discovery.

Which, honestly, is what it should be.

If you are not sure where to start, that is okay. That is exactly what we are here for: ivyembercc.com