Sandra N Deladem

By Sandra Deladem

Culled from Encounter The Glory Magazine (November edition)

A Reflection on the Virtuous Woman of Proverbs 31

“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” — Proverbs 31:10 (KJV)

Once again, I ask: Woman, who art thou?

Dear woman, dear young lady, do you truly know your worth? Are you aware of the power God has deposited in you to influence the world around you? Do you understand the value of godly character and the divine responsibility God has entrusted to you? Or have you allowed the world to define you by your outward appearance, your achievements, your possessions, your relationships, and the opinions of others?

The Bible presents a description of a woman whose worth surpasses all these.

Today, I beg you to pause for a moment and consider this description from the Bible: “A woman whose worth is far above rubies”! What a remarkable description.

We are all aware of the value placed on precious stones, how expensive and treasured they are for their rarity, beauty, and value. In fact, it is not every day that you walk by and find a precious stone. Hence, Scripture uses this powerful comparison to draw our attention to something far more precious than outward adornment: the beauty of godly character.

The Bible does not mince words when it declares that the price of a virtuous woman is far above rubies, meaning the worth of a virtuous woman stands tall above precious stones.

Now, why would the Bible make such a profound comparison? What is it about this woman—and what is it about you, dear woman—that makes her worth so extraordinary?

Well, let us take a closer look at the source of this analogy and explore the qualities that make the virtuous woman so precious. As we journey through Proverbs 31, I invite you to examine yourself honestly, reflect on the characteristics Scripture highlights, and ask yourself: Who am I? Where do I stand? How much of this woman do I see reflected in my own life?

In Proverbs 31, we are introduced to a woman whose worth cannot be measured by the world's standards. Her value is not determined by her outward beauty, social status, material possessions, or her popularity among men. Rather, the Bible draws our attention to things far more enduring: the beauty of her character, her wisdom and choice of words, her diligence—that is, the work of her hands—the compassion of her heart, and, above all, her reverence for the Lord God.

Please read along with me through Proverbs 31. Take your time to carefully examine each sentence, every word, and every description of this woman—the woman God desires you to become.

This is not some distant, imaginary woman, as many of us may have come to perceive her when reading this Scripture. No, dear woman, this is about you and me! This is about who we are called to be when we begin to see ourselves through God's eyes and understand the worth He places on us and our character.

It is only when we truly recognise our worth from God's perspective that we will begin to understand that Proverbs 31 is not merely a description of another woman to admire from a distance.

I must confess that, when I was a young lady in my teens and even twenties, this was exactly how I perceived the Proverbs 31 woman. To me, she was someone far removed from ordinary women like myself—a woman of exceptional character, extraordinary virtue, and remarkable strength. I admired her, but I did not fully comprehend that I, too, could become that woman.

I failed to realise that the woman described in that Scripture was not simply someone to admire from a distance, but a reflection of the woman I could become as I grew in my walk with God. Her qualities were not there merely for me to read about, admire, and afterwards forget, but to inspire me to prayerfully ask God to make me a Proverbs 31 woman, to give me her wisdom, virtue, strength, compassion, and reverence for Him, and to help me conscientiously live as she did.

Many ladies have read and heard about the Proverbs 31 woman but, just like me, do not know they have also been equipped with all that she has. Scripture says in verse 17: “She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.”

First of all, this virtuous woman is not portrayed as helpless or incapable. On the contrary, she is a diligent, resourceful, and strong woman. She is made strong by God because she allows her strength to coexist with her tender heart, and her courage is matched by her humility. She does not carry every burden alone; she gets support from God and praise from her husband.

This is where many ladies fall short, because who and where you seek support from matters.

What I observed next in this Scripture is a woman who understands that her words are a reflection of her character and that her tongue is a powerful instrument that can either build or destroy.

Proverbs 31:26 declares, “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.”

Dear woman, Scripture tells us how she opens her mouth—with wisdom. This suggests that her words are not careless, reckless, or driven solely by emotion. She understands that what comes out of her mouth carries weight, influences lives, and can leave lasting impressions on those who hear her. Take note of how this woman decided to govern her tongue with kindness so that, at any time she opens her mouth, kind, fruitful, and beautiful words proceed from it.

The Bible beautifully describes this: “In her tongue is the law of kindness.” In fact, kindness is not merely an occasional gesture for this woman; it is a principle that governs her speech. It is as though kindness has become the law by which her tongue operates. Even when she must correct, confront, advise, or speak an uncomfortable truth, she does so with discernment and consideration for others.

Woman, who art thou when you open your mouth? Is there any law governing your mouth?

Understand today that your influence is not limited to what you can do with your hands; it must also extend to what you release through your mouth. The Proverbs 31 woman used her words to nurture confidence and establish godly values both at home and in her community.

Scripture also mentions that “her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:11–12). This woman gained the confidence of her spouse because of her godly character.

In verses 13–15, we read: “She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.” This means she is not, by any means, lazy. She works to feed her family.

Scripture further reveals that she is an industrious and enterprising woman who carefully considers a field and purchases it. From the fruit of her labour and earnings, she plants a vineyard (Proverbs 31:16).

A very productive and enterprising woman indeed. Woman, who art thou? Only you can answer whether you are productive or a busybody.

Now, here is something particularly intriguing that caught my attention about this woman of noble character. Scripture tells us: “She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night” (Proverbs 31:18).

What a loaded verse!

The Bible draws our attention not only to her diligence and ability to conduct profitable business but also to the fact that her lamp does not go out at night. What does this tell us about her character, her priorities, and the way she manages the responsibilities entrusted to her by God? Let us take a closer look.

We are aware that this woman is industrious, enterprising, and wise in her dealings. She considers a field, purchases it, plants a vineyard, and engages in profitable trade. Yet, in the midst of all her activities, the Bible adds another intriguing detail: “her lamp does not go out at night.”

So, what does this mean? Why would Scripture draw our attention to the fact that her lamp remains burning at night? Is it simply describing a woman who works long hours, or is there something more we can learn from this extra information?

Oil in Scripture stands for anointing, the anointing of God on a person's life. This woman surely had it. No wonder she had all the qualities of a woman of God and a successful, graceful woman of power. This was the source of her strength, wisdom, and character.

Dear woman, you need to desire the anointing of God, the oil that will keep your lamp burning until the return of the Saviour. It is the anointing of God that will make a way for you, crown your efforts with success, and give you the favour you need to succeed. Whether you are building a business, nurturing a marriage, raising children, pursuing a career, or serving in ministry, you need God's anointing, wisdom, and grace. Human strength alone is not enough; you need God to lead you, sustain you, and establish the work of your hands.

These and many more questions are necessary for you to ponder.

To know who you are, first ask yourself: Do you know God, and are you attentive to what He has entrusted to you? Are you cultivating your gifts, managing your responsibilities wisely, and preparing for the opportunities that lie ahead? Are you allowing God's Word to guide your decisions? The Proverbs 31 woman reminds us that godly character is expressed not only in what we profess but also in how we live, work, plan, and care for those entrusted to us.

She was a giver, a woman of compassion. Scripture mentions that “she stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy” (Proverbs 31:20). Her compassion is practical; she stretches out her hand and responds to the needs of others.

She does not harbour the fear of tomorrow. Scripture says, “Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come” (Proverbs 31:25).

What a beautiful picture of a woman who does not fear.

Dear woman, what is clothing your heart today? Is it fear, bitterness, comparison, regret, or unforgiveness? It is time to allow faith, honour, wisdom, and hope to clothe you.

Now, to crown her gloriously, the Bible says, “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30).

Here lies the heart of the Proverbs 31 woman. After describing her diligence, strength, wisdom, compassion, business activities, and care for her household, Scripture brings us to the foundation of her life, the very core of her being: the fear of the Lord.

This is complete reverence for God with one's body, spirit, and soul. This is a woman whose desire is to honour God and who is willing to order her life according to His wisdom.

Indeed, in every season of her life, her reverence for God remained the foundation of her character and the guiding principle of her life.

She understood who God was, and more importantly, she understood who she was without Him. She recognised that her wisdom, strength, abilities, and accomplishments were all possible through God's help.

Dear woman, there is a profound difference between knowing what you are capable of achieving and knowing who you are in God. The virtuous woman understood that her worth was not rooted in her achievements alone, but in the character she cultivated through her reverence for the Lord. Thus, her value was far greater than rubies.

Dear woman, dear young lady, who are you? Whose image do you bear, and whose character are you cultivating?

As you reflect on the woman described in Proverbs 31, I want you to understand that she is not defined by a particular skin colour, nationality, culture, family name, or social status. She belongs to no single race, nation, or generation. Neither are the virtues that distinguish her confined to a particular background. No! They are qualities that every woman who desires to honour God can seek to cultivate.

Dear woman, the Proverbs 31 woman can be you! Her wisdom, diligence, kindness, compassion in her actions, and reverence for God can be yours.

Remember, you do not have to be born into a particular family, raised in a certain country, or possess a specific level of wealth or education to pursue the character described in these Scriptures or to attain the value of the Proverbs 31 woman.

What matters is the willingness to allow God to shape your heart, change your character, and guide your steps.

So, once again, I ask you: Woman, who art thou?

May you never again read Proverbs 31 merely as the story of a remarkable woman who lived long ago, as I did for many years.

Read it as an invitation to examine your own life. Desire godly wisdom, and become the woman God is calling you to be.

So, dear woman, know your worth and honour God, your Creator, so that the fruit of your life can speak for generations to come.

As the year draws to a close, many of us find ourselves reflecting on the promises we received, the dreams we pursued, the prayers we prayed, and the expectations that remain unfulfilled. Perhaps you began this year with great hope, believing that certain doors would open, certain breakthroughs would come, and long-awaited promises would finally become a reality. Yet, here you are, approaching the end of another year, still waiting.

Or perhaps you entered this year with plans, dreams, and visions ready to be pursued and brought to fruition. You had a clear sense of direction and were determined to see things through, but you met opposition, doubt crept in, and now that vision feels uncertain—maybe even forgotten. If so, I urge you: Wake up and seize that vision once more. Through prayer, return to what you have written down or to what you know in your spirit you are called to do. It's never too late to begin again.

Does this mean God has forgotten you? Does the delay mean the vision has failed? Absolutely not!

I am reminded of a solemn yet unwavering promise in Scripture:

"For the vision is yet for an appointed time… Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry." — Habakkuk 2:3

The path to birthing a vision is never easy, but it is eternally rewarding. Consider a woman with child: as her promise grows visible, she may face curiosity, teasing, or even disbelief, jealousy, and anger from observers. Yet, with patient endurance, she carries the promise to its appointed hour, and when the child is born, she nurtures it with care. So it is with the vision entrusted to you.

The process from divine conception to the delivery of your vision must be handled with care. Some may laugh at its conception or write it off before it takes form. Others may respond with envy or frustration. But hold on.

If your vision is from God and of God, it will come to pass. It is set for an appointed time. Every significant vision requires a gestation period, so this is your charge:

• Do not kill the vision with disbelief.
• Do not abandon the vision to fear.
• Do not be slack in nurturing it.

Your vision is worth waiting for. It is worth fighting for. So, in this new season, talk to God about it incessantly. Ask for His strength, His strategy, and His timing. Wait for it, for it will surely come; it will not delay.

So, end the year not with vague hope, but with steadfast confidence in the God who gave you the vision, dream, or desire.