Steph Minaya

I attribute my success to the many people who have supported me along this journey. I have at least 10 to 15 different mentors that help me in specific areas when I have questions that I can go to. When I moved to New York about two years ago, I was starting fresh from a worse place, and I almost felt like I had no one. So when I was starting to build myself back up again, I recognized that I needed to have people who I trusted, that were in my corner, that I could lean on to give me advice for experiences that I was not used to or accustomed to. Having those people kind of be my cheerleaders, but also help me course correct when I was off base or off course, was life-changing. In addition to that, a lot of it had to do with how I was raised. I like to consider myself a fighter, and I think a lot of times when the world or just things weren't aligning and no's were just consistent rejection, the way that I was raised really just taught me that rejection is redirection, as opposed to rejection means I'm doing something wrong and I need to give up. My parents raising me and knowing that I can make my dreams come true in a way that works for me was life-changing.

The biggest thing, and it sounds so simple, but follow what feels good. What I mean by that is learning to trust your gut and what it means to trust yourself. I think that applies across relationships or work. If you're in a situation where something just doesn't feel right, it's not aligning, don't be scared to leave early. Your body will often know before your brain does, so just trust those signals and let yourself follow them. You'll find yourself again, even if it feels lost. I want to remind women that we are entirely capable of the things that we dream of, our wildest dreams we're capable of. Sometimes, I think oftentimes, even myself, I've been struggling with this a lot lately, like being single and building on your own can be hard, but it is so, so incredibly worthwhile. Even if you don't have a partner or someone to lean on in that way, you can do it. Influential doesn't mean that you have everything figured out. It means that you're trusting yourself and going with what your heart or gut tells you, and that's more important sometimes than having someone by your side.

I think the biggest challenge is the fact that I am reaching people through social media and asking them to put their phone down. One of the things that I get at nearly all of my events is, how are you an influencer, yet you're telling people to put your phones down? It's a very real thing - technology can help us as much as it hurts us, and so navigating that gap while also toeing the line of I am using technology can be a little complicated. The other thing is that I'm working against algorithms. Oftentimes, Facebook and Instagram and even TikTok will push content that's more negative, and so what I am trying to do with the joy work is push the opposite narrative, and that can oftentimes be difficult to get my message out there. It's just part of the process.

I really, really value honesty, both critical and kind. Going back to those mentors and curating an environment where they feel like they can be honest with me has been crucial. Another value is just compassion - compassion for other people, compassion for my experience. And lastly, I would say joy. Letting myself experience joy. There's a lot of grief in joy, but I am really grateful that I get to continue to choose joy.