Finding Purpose After Heartbreak
How Grief Became My Greatest Teacher and Led Me to My Life's Purpose
Heartbreak has a way of changing everything. It changes how you see the world. It changes what matters. It changes your priorities, your perspective, and sometimes even your identity.
Most of us never expect the moments that break our hearts to become the moments that shape our purpose. Yet when I look back on my own journey, I realize that some of my greatest growth emerged from one of the most painful seasons of my life.
Like many people, I once believed purpose was something you discovered through success, achievement, or reaching a destination. What I have learned is that purpose is often revealed through adversity. Sometimes, purpose finds us in the middle of heartbreak.
When I Lost My Mother to COVID
When I lost my mother to COVID, my world changed forever. Just seven days later, my grandmother, who lived with us, also passed away. In a matter of days, my family experienced unimaginable loss. There is no roadmap for grief—no timeline, no checklist, no instruction manual for learning how to move forward when someone you love is no longer here.
What I quickly learned is that grief affects every part of your life. It impacts your emotions, your relationships, your faith, your motivation, and your outlook on the future. It forces you to confront questions you never expected to ask:
- What matters most?
- How do I honor the people I love?
- What kind of life do I want to build moving forward?
Those questions stayed with me. As difficult as that season was, it also became a turning point.
What Started as Grief Became Purpose
My mother dedicated more than 35 years of her life to nursing. She cared for patients during some of their most vulnerable moments. She worked long shifts, advocated for families, and pursued excellence in her profession while raising three daughters. Her life was defined by service, compassion, perseverance, and commitment. After she passed away, I knew I wanted her legacy to continue. That desire eventually became the Patricia “Nurse Pat” Edwards Nursing Scholarship.
What started as grief became purpose. What started as loss became impact. Today, the scholarship helps support future nurses who are pursuing the same profession my mother loved so deeply. Through fundraising efforts, community support, and the launch of our inaugural Double Down Gala, we have worked to create opportunities for the next generation of healthcare professionals. None of that would have existed had I allowed heartbreak to have the final word.
That does not mean the pain disappeared. It did not. Healing is not about forgetting. Healing is about learning how to carry both love and loss at the same time.
Purpose Is Often Built One Step at a Time
One of the greatest misconceptions about purpose is that it arrives fully formed. In reality, purpose is often built one step at a time. It develops through our experiences, our struggles, our faith, and our willingness to keep moving forward even when life feels uncertain.
Heartbreak taught me that purpose is not always found in what happens to us. Sometimes, purpose is found in how we respond.
We cannot always control the challenges we face. We cannot prevent loss. We cannot avoid disappointment. But we can decide what we do next.
We can choose bitterness or growth. We can choose isolation or connection. We can choose to allow our pain to define us, or we can allow it to develop us.
I chose purpose—not because it was easy, and not because I had all the answers, but because I knew the people I loved deserved a legacy larger than their loss.
Influence Is Not Born from Perfection
Being named a 2026 Influential Woman has given me an opportunity to reflect on that journey. When people see accomplishments, recognition, or leadership, they often see the outcome. What they do not always see are the difficult seasons that helped shape the person standing before them.
Influence is not born from perfection. It is often born from perseverance. It is built through resilience, faith, service, and the willingness to keep going when life becomes difficult.
If there is one lesson I have learned, it is this: heartbreak can break your heart without breaking your purpose. In fact, sometimes heartbreak becomes the very thing that reveals it.
Love Does Not End When a Person Leaves This Earth
The people we lose leave more than memories behind. They leave lessons, values, examples, and inspiration. They leave pieces of themselves within us that continue to guide us long after they are gone. Perhaps that is why purpose and heartbreak are often connected—because love does not end when a person leaves this earth. Sometimes love evolves into action. Sometimes it becomes service. Sometimes it becomes legacy.
And sometimes, it becomes the reason we discover what we were called to do all along.
