Check on the Strong Ones, Too
Checking in with the people who seem to have it all together this Suicide Prevention Awareness Month.
Remember the Strong Ones: A Reminder During Suicide Prevention Awareness Month
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, and every year we see reminders to check on the people we love. But I think sometimes we forget to check on the people who always seem to have it together.
You know the ones.
The person everybody calls when something goes wrong. The one who keeps everybody laughing. The one who shows up for everybody else. The one who says, “I’m good,” and keeps moving.
Sometimes that person needs somebody to check on them, too.
The truth is, we don’t always know what people are carrying behind closed doors. A smile doesn’t necessarily mean everything is okay. Going to work every day doesn’t mean everything is okay. Showing up at church, taking care of your family, running a business, helping other people, or posting a smiling picture on social media doesn’t mean everything is okay.
People can be functioning and still be hurting.
That’s why I believe we have to become more intentional about each other.
And when I say check on somebody, I don’t mean sending a quick, “You good?” and moving on when they say yes.
Sometimes we need to slow down long enough to really listen.
“How are you doing—for real?”
“You’ve been on my mind. Is everything okay?”
“Do you need somebody to talk to?”
Those few extra words might open a door that someone has been afraid to open.
We also have to make room for people to tell the truth. If someone tells us they’re struggling, that isn’t the time to tell them they should be grateful because somebody else has it worse. It isn’t the time to tell them to just get over it.
Sometimes people don’t need us to fix anything. They just need to know that somebody is willing to listen without judging them.
And as a woman of faith, I absolutely believe in prayer. Prayer has carried me through some difficult seasons in my own life. But I also believe we can pray for somebody and sit with them. We can pray and help them find support. We can pray and make the phone call.
Faith doesn’t stop us from reaching out for help.
I’ve lived long enough to know that life can get heavy.
I’ve also learned that hard seasons don’t always last, even when it feels like they will.
Sometimes you just need somebody beside you while you’re walking through one.
So this September, yes, let’s talk about suicide prevention. Let’s share the resources. Let’s wear the colors and post the graphics.
But let’s also do something that doesn’t require a post.
Call somebody.
Sit with somebody.
Listen without trying to fix everything.
Pay attention when somebody doesn’t seem like themselves.
And please remember the strong ones.
Sometimes the person who spends the most time making sure everybody else is okay is quietly hoping somebody will ask if they’re okay, too.
And if that person happens to be you, please know that asking for help doesn’t take away your strength. You don’t have to carry everything by yourself.
Keep going.
There is still hope ahead.
If You or Someone You Know Needs Support
If you are struggling or worried about someone else, please reach out for support.
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 for crisis support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a trained volunteer Crisis Counselor. Support is free, confidential, and available 24/7.
NAMI HelpLine: Call 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or text NAMI to 62640 for mental health information and resources. The HelpLine is available Monday through Friday from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Eastern Time.
If there is an immediate, life-threatening emergency, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department.
You matter. Your life matters. And whatever today looks like, your story does not have to end here.
