From Playing Small to Playing Big

From Playing Small to Playing Big

I was once told, "You don't look the part, so no one would want to work with you." Ouch.

At the time, I was playing small—hiding behind my fear of being seen, being judged, imposter syndrome, and everything in between. So, it was no surprise that someone made that judgment about me. It was the exact fear I was holding onto, and that was the energy I was putting out for everyone to see.

Sometimes, hiding looked like wearing dark, bulky clothes. Sometimes, it looked like not posting myself or my work on social media. Sometimes, it meant saying no to events or partnering with entrepreneurs who were louder, more colorful, and what I considered more vibrant than me.

All the while, I kept wondering why my business wasn't flourishing in the way I knew it could. Not just hoped it could. I knew it could, from the depths of my core.

And then something happened that changed everything. I shifted, and here's how you can shift, too.

Get Your Body on Board

Our bodies keep score. They take in the words we tell ourselves, the words others tell us, our experiences, our environment, and even the foods we eat. Our bodies are constantly taking in information and responding to what we are experiencing.

You may be thinking, But I don't want to play small. I'm not telling my body that.

But are you playing big?

Are you saying yes to the things that scare you while intuitively knowing they are worth pursuing?

The first step is getting your body on board.

It sounds simple, and it can be if you are dedicated to practicing it.

Your nervous system needs to know that it is safe to soften, regulate, and expand. You can begin reminding it.

If you find yourself getting sweaty, feeling anxious, or talking yourself out of something that simultaneously lights you up and scares you, pause.

Take a few deep breaths in through your nose and slowly exhale through your mouth.

Then repeat:

"I am safe playing big."

"I am safe being seen."

EFT/TFT can be an excellent technique to incorporate while repeating these affirmations. The goal is to keep reminding your body: I am safe. I can do this. I don't have to hide.

Take Action

Now that your body is a little more on board, take action.

Do the thing you have been hiding from.

If you dream of becoming a motivational speaker, find a smaller speaking engagement in your local community and apply to be a guest speaker. Or record a 60-second video and post it on your social media pages.

Starting small allows your body to continue learning that being seen is safe. Then, you build from there.

Every time the crowd gets a little larger, you become a little more comfortable. Before you know it, you may find yourself standing in front of thousands of people, wondering why you ever thought you couldn't.

When you begin to feel more confident and your nervous system stops immediately going into freeze or flight, push yourself a little further.

Go deeper, get a little uncomfortable, then take another leap.

When we are stepping into who we are becoming, our bodies can experience discomfort. But that feeling can also be a gift of awareness. It can be your invitation to explore what is possible instead of automatically retreating into what is familiar.

Support Yourself Along the Way

There are simple practices that can support you as you learn to play bigger.

• Ground yourself. Grounding is an excellent way to reconnect with your body, soften your breath, and support your nervous system when you feel overwhelmed or activated. Get outside. Put your feet in the grass. Take a walk. Let your body remember that it is supported.
• Meditate. Meditation is another beautiful practice for supporting the nervous system, reducing stress, cultivating inner peace, and strengthening the mind-body connection. You don't need an hour of silence on a mountaintop. Start with five minutes. Consistency matters more than perfection.
• Support Vata dosha. In Ayurveda, Vata is made up of the elements of air and space and is associated with qualities such as movement, creativity, and enthusiasm. When we are constantly moving, creating, thinking, and pushing ourselves outside of our comfort zones, supporting Vata can help create a greater sense of grounding and stability.

Warm herbal teas, room-temperature water, warming spices such as ginger, cinnamon, cardamom, cumin, and fennel, and nourishing root vegetables can all be incorporated into a grounding routine.

And don't forget your voice. Vata is also connected with communication and expression, making this a beautiful reminder to use your voice and speak your truth.

Speak It Into Existence

Now, this doesn't mean you simply say something and magically make it happen, but words are powerful.

When we get our body on board and begin believing the words we are speaking, we can become more confident in taking the action required to create the reality we desire.

Every day, go to the mirror.

Look yourself in the eyes.

Tell yourself you are meant for this.

Own who you are becoming.

If you are stepping into becoming a CEO, you might say:

"I am a strong, successful CEO. I know how to grow this business, lead with purpose, and do great things with it."

Or create your own words. The only rule is to make it part of your daily practice.

Because playing big isn't about becoming someone else. It isn't about being the loudest person in the room, having the most followers, or looking a certain way. It is about giving yourself permission to be fully seen. To take up space. To use your voice. To trust what you already know and to stop abandoning yourself every time something feels uncomfortable.

Playing big by stepping into who you are becoming doesn't mean you are making other people play small. It means you are making space for you to expand in ways you didn't give yourself permission to before.

So, my love, if you've been waiting for permission to play bigger, consider this your sign.

Your body is ready. Your voice is ready. Your next version of you is already waiting.

Now go meet her.