The American Dream and a Three-Day Suspension
How the company we keep shapes us, and why true influence comes from our daily choices, not our status.
When it comes to influencing someone’s life, the impact can be huge—it can be either good or bad. Early in life, parents, grandparents, and elders warn children to stay away from bad company. I grew up hearing the saying, “Show me your company, and I’ll tell you who you are.” But I do not think it is fair to judge people solely by the friends they keep.
My father told my siblings and me that we should never look down on anyone. Everyone plays a part in the game of life. We can learn from everyone’s behavior. Even the wealthiest people can learn from these moments. My father always reminded us to have three kinds of friends: the good, the bad, and the indifferent.
We should not walk through life acting like “goody-two-shoes.” There is a little bad in the best of us, and a little good in the worst of us. I am not a psychologist, but current events make me believe that people are born with both good and bad inside them. I do not know what triggers either side. I leave that to the professionals.
Sometimes We Look Up to People
Sometimes we look up to people just because they have luxury, status, or privilege. In high school, I fell into that trap. One of my friends left school early to move to the United States. To us, America was the ultimate dream. It seemed powerful and safe. I longed to go there. To me, England, Canada, and Africa were not special. America was the cream of the crop.
Surprisingly, my friend moved back to Jamaica and returned to our school. Two other classmates and I became close with her again. We were excited because of her American experience. She told us fairy-tale stories about her school in the States. She said students did not wear uniforms, they drank beer, smoked, and had boyfriends. Even though this went against my Christian faith and strict parents, I did not judge her.
We Decided to Live the American Dream
One day, the four of us decided to live the American dream. We saved up money to buy beer and beef patties for lunch. We felt stylish sitting in a popular restaurant. However, we forgot one huge mistake: we were still wearing our school uniforms. Students from my high school were expected to behave with care. After our lovely lunch, we were called to the principal’s office. We all received a three-day suspension.
Because the school thought I was just following bad company, they let me return the next day. My three friends had to serve the full suspension. After that event, I walked a tightrope all the way to graduation and into adult life.
True Influence Happens in Our Quiet, Daily Habits
As an adult, I learned that you do not need a luxury lifestyle to change the world. True influence happens in our quiet, daily habits. It happens when we give someone our full attention without looking at our phones. It happens when we listen closely to a friend who is hurting, making them feel safe and valued. By choosing to lead by example instead of just giving advice, we create a positive ripple effect around us.
That experience taught me not to let society’s trends ruin my personal growth. It is fine to have fun, but there is a time and place for it. Many things can destroy good behavior. Whatever we do, whether silently or aloud, we should uplift others. Do not be fooled by high status. Stay grounded, alert, and humble. Let your life be a light of purpose. Keep your eyes on your own growth. Do not look for influence in the upper echelons of society—look for it in the simple choice to uplift the person standing right next to you.
