What Doesn't Kill Us, Makes us Stronger
From Survival to Thriving: A Journey of Resilience, Faith, and Finding Purpose Through Adversity
Two of my mother’s favorite sayings were, “God doesn’t give us anything that we can’t handle,” and “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” Then, when she was only fifty-six years old, she contracted Guillain-Barré Syndrome, complicated by her diabetes, and within six months she had passed away. There was no warning and very little time to prepare. I was devastated that the one person who believed in me more than anyone else in the world was no longer alive to help me navigate life without her.
To understand how I have arrived at where I am today, I should explain my background. I was the oldest of four children and grew up in a small town. We struggled daily, and my parents worked long hours and side hustles to ensure each of us had what we needed—music lessons, 4-H projects, summer camps, new clothes, musical instruments, and transportation to all of our practices and events. As the oldest, I was the first in my family to do many things. I graduated third in my high school class and attended college in a nearby town so I could commute and save money. I worked two part-time jobs and did everything I could to support my family.
During my four years of college, life was not easy. I lost my grandmother, my house burned down, I wrecked my car, my boyfriend was in a severe car accident that left him with a back injury, my grandfather passed away, I had a miscarriage, and I moved out of my parents’ house.
Eventually, I recovered, reorganized, and reprioritized my life. Just when things were beginning to improve, the unthinkable happened. I had just bought my first home when my mother passed away. Eighteen months later, I was diagnosed with diabetes and hospitalized with an infected abscess. Once again, I had to pivot and restructure my life. I began managing diabetes and Hashimoto’s disease, along with the complications from those debilitating illnesses. I started volunteering at the San Antonio Livestock Show and Rodeo to help kids like me, who grew up in farming communities, access scholarships for college. The “temporary” job I had taken at a brick company turned into a twenty-year career as an office manager and eventually logistics manager, working with Mexican brick plants, coordinating deliveries, and managing a yard in Eagle Pass. I worked in the brick business for twenty years and enjoyed both the work and the people I worked with.
In 2016, I took a short medical leave to have my gallbladder removed and undergo cataract surgery on both eyes. Again, I pivoted, returned shortly afterward, and began working at a general contractor. JC Stoddard Construction gave me the opportunity to learn about historical restoration and preservation, and I gained valuable lessons about sustainability and protecting Texas heritage. I evolved into a leader within the company. I enjoyed preconstruction and contract administration, as well as working on historical projects.
Working for a family-owned heritage business aligned well with my small-town upbringing. I became involved with the National Association of Women in Construction, serving as a board member. I attended the NAWIC conference in Biloxi, Mississippi, in 2021, and in preparation for the trip I got a pedicure. While there, I developed a blister on my foot and brushed it aside, covering it with a Band-Aid until I returned home.
One week later, on May 21, 2021, I woke up in the afternoon to find my foot extremely swollen and discolored—purple and black. My friend immediately rushed me to the hospital. I coded in the hospital and was placed in the ICU. Three days later, my fourth metatarsal was amputated. Two days after that, I underwent another surgery to debride the wound. This led to nine days in the hospital, thirty-eight weeks of IV antibiotics, forty hyperbaric oxygen treatments, and more than 172 doctor appointments with at least nine specialists. I endured two additional surgeries over the following months, and on December 20, 2021, my fifth metatarsal (my pinky toe) and part of my right foot were amputated.
Just when I thought I had recovered, in 2022 I developed another infection in my ankle joint, diagnosed as septic arthritis. It felt as though I could not catch a break. I underwent six more weeks of IV antibiotics, twelve iron infusions, and thirty additional hyperbaric sessions. After months of treatment, research, and advocating for myself to avoid a below-the-knee amputation, the infection was finally resolved.
Throughout my medical battles, I continued working. Many days involved waking up early, going to the hospital for hyperbaric treatment, and then heading to work to prepare RFQs or contracts, followed by returning home to dress wounds that never seemed to fully heal. It was an ordeal, but I survived.
In 2024, after thirty years apart, I reconnected with my high school sweetheart and learned that he had been facing his own health struggles. A back injury in his twenties, combined with years of asthma, smoking, diabetes, and congenital heart issues, had led to stage 4 COPD. We began talking for hours and were married in 2025—thirty-eight years after our first date. He is the rock that keeps me grounded and my biggest cheerleader. He encouraged me to publish the children’s book I wrote when my mother was alive but never published, and inspired me to continue writing. Although he is retired, he gets up every morning to prepare my breakfast and lunch. I receive a note of encouragement and love with my lunch every day.
I used to feel embarrassed when people called me strong or said I had overcome adversity. In my mind, I was simply doing what I had to do to survive. Now, I am at a stage in my career where surviving is no longer the goal—thriving and enjoying life are.
I will never be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company or lead mergers for a global conglomerate. What I will do is coordinate the historical preservation of a hundred-year-old courthouse or ensure that employees in the field have clean portable facilities and proper safety training. Some women are leaders in quieter ways. I may not be the loud voice of a large national contractor building skyscrapers, but I will be the steady voice behind the scenes, ensuring subcontractors comply with standards and projects are completed correctly. Leadership is not only about standing in front of a room; it is about building cohesive teams. It is about hiring smart people so they can contribute, not so you can control them. True leadership is bringing out the best in everyone and using those strengths to create something meaningful.
While my career as an office manager and project coordinator is fulfilling, my true passion has always been creativity. My husband encouraged me to publish my first children’s book in April. Marvin the Mason Mouse is the first in a series about construction trades. My second book, Duckily Ever After, is based on our love story and focuses on acceptance and second chances. My third book, part of the trades series, is about girl power and women in construction. Patty the Plumber to the Rescue is dedicated to all the little girls who want to be plumbers and electricians like their fathers.
This second phase of my career has been the most rewarding so far. I am proud of myself for stepping outside my comfort zone and trying something new.
While I still believe that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, I do not fully agree that God never gives us more than we can handle. After thirty years in the construction industry, I have faced more obstacles than I can count. I believe that with God’s grace and help, we are able to handle what life places before us. If my theory is incorrect, then God must believe I can handle anything, because He has certainly thrown a few curveballs my way.
The most important thing is that I am still in the batter’s box, still swinging. This game is not over yet.
