When She Discovered the Power of Saying “I Don't Know”

I've learned there's nothing wrong with saying, "I don't know, but I'll find out." Taking the time to research something has taught me far more than pretending I already know the answer.

I tell my team quite often "I don't know" but it's always quickly followed up with "but I will find out, and we'll learn together." Most recently we won a project that we're deploying in 39 countries, which is a first for our company. There have been multiple questions from my team on how we're going to deploy this and I don't have the answers. I love to pull my team into those higher level discussions if it's appropriate to give them a platform in front of leadership.

For me, discovering the power of saying "I don't know" has come through many moments. As a neurodivergent woman who has survived brain trauma and experienced memory loss, I sometimes need more time to retrieve an answer. My brain may have to return to the beginning of an experience and walk forward, piece by piece, before I can explain what I know. Sometimes the answer comes after the meeting ends, after I hang up the phone, or when I get into the car. For years, I avoided rooms, platforms, and conversations because I feared having to say, "I don't know." What I called a "glitch" in my brain became something I used to question my intelligence, my ability to lead, and my worth. As I began finding my voice and embracing my neurodivergence, I learned that what others cannot see is still a real part of my story. I also learned to say, "I don't know right now. Let me think through it and get back to you." Those words give me room to process, respond thoughtfully, and lead with honesty. By the grace of God, I am still fulfilling the purpose on my life. The experiences I once feared would disqualify me are now helping me recognize overlooked needs, ask deeper questions, and create spaces where others can belong. Sharing that part of my story has opened doors in this season of my life. My encouragement to anyone navigating memory gaps, brain trauma, depression, or a different way of processing is this: Give yourself time. Retrace your steps, gather your thoughts, ask for support, and follow up when you can. Sometimes the answer will still be uncertain, and you deserve grace in those moments, too. "I don't know" no longer gets to define my worth. It gives me a place to begin with honesty, curiosity, and the courage to keep going.

In an industry that is constantly changing, it's difficult to know all the answers. Understanding that you might not always know the answer is important. I believe that in my industry being honest to my customers and telling them I do not know the answer is important. One thing to always do is tell them you don't have the answer right now but you will get back to them. Follow through and find out the answer and get the information over to them. It's important to understand that we are all human and we don't all the information but clients like it when you are honest and transparent about not knowing the answer right away rather than to lie about it. It's important to educate yourself in your field to reduce the times you don't have the answer. Learn as you go and better yourself each and every day until you master it. Not knowing doesn't always have to be a bad thing.

Throughout my growth process there have been plenty of times where I might not have had the right answers, however I always knew I would figure it out. I didn't build my career by pretending to have all the answers. I built my foundation on staying curious, asking questions, and staying willing to learn. To me, confidence doesn't come from knowing everything. It's trusting yourself enough to know you'll find the answers and figure it out.