Personal testimony of Jodi Van Dyke
From Darkness to Light: A Journey of Grace, Redemption, and Surrender
I grew up with no siblings,
used to living life my own way.
My parents smoked marijuana
and tipped the bottle.
At times, my father’s behavior became hostile.
I’d sneak out of my bedroom window
to go next door and call the cops.
All of this left a bad taste in my mouth—
and it wasn’t butterscotch.
So I hit the pews with my grandma
and found a group called Awana.
I got saved—thanks to the Son of God.
God, You are mighty!
You saved me from two suicide attempts as a teen.
I intentionally overdosed on medication.
They pumped my stomach clean.
My heart broke during this time
because my father moved on to Heaven.
Second Corinthians 6:18 says God is my Father,
but I still wanted this part of my life
to be just a movie I was rentin’.
Thank You, God, that You answered
when I asked You to come sit with me.
Because another thing I lost early
was my virginity.
I graduated high school with honors
and went on to college.
I received a degree in interior design—
I was meant to be stylish.
Bad boys seemed to be my attraction.
Eventually, emotional abuse and disloyalty
no longer gave me satisfaction.
I carried around depression and distrust.
I got so lonely that I went to a rave
and tried Ecstasy once.
I’ve since prayed Psalm 25:7—
“Forgive the sins of my youth,”
including the parties I hosted
with dancing and drinks.
And my lowest points—
a few moments of sexual immorality
that still make my heart sink.
I knew who Christ was all along.
My heart was right.
My behavior was wrong.
As an adult, I was diagnosed by a doctor
with a mental illness.
I believe it was the enemy
pulling at my potential.
“Overly religious,” they described me.
So they locked me up in an institution.
Matthew 10:33 says I did not deny Him,
and He will not deny me.
Psalm 119:71 states it was good for me to suffer;
therefore, when it comes to God’s commands,
I’ll be more of a lover.
After three times in, I was obviously blessed.
God brought me a husband—
He brought me the best.
I had to learn that marriage takes sacrifice
and doesn’t always come
with the same kind of adventure.
There were a few hard years
because I made a musician my idol.
It took my time, my attention, and our money.
Thank God that I am forgiven,
and Job 11:17 says
life—even darkness—will be sunny.
We extended our family
by three children we will love forever.
This wasn’t my plan
until one day I said,
“God, I surrender.”
We now attend church weekly—
a place of accountability,
because God says in James 4:8,
“Draw near to Me, and I will draw near to you.”
In fact, we also attend a few extra groups.
We are better together.
We don’t want those connections to come loose.
Matthew 22:37 tells us
the most important connection is vertical.
He’s got the whole world in His hands,
and we are called to love the whole circle.
Insecurity once flooded my heart
and still tries to drown me out today.
Matthew 4:19 says
He will make us fishers of men.
You can find me sittin’
on the dock of the bay.
