Get in the Picture, Girl! Your Family Needs to See You, Too
Why the woman you love deserves to be in the picture
Let me start with a confession. I hate having my picture made. Seriously. I can photograph people all day long, but turn that camera around on me, and I literally get nauseated.
It's not that I hate how I look. I'm pretty okay with the way God made me. (Okay, there are a few things I'd change if He were taking requests, but overall, we're good.) The problem comes when I see the finished photograph. Just like so many of my clients, my eyes immediately go to every little flaw. Never mind the smile, the moment, or the people standing beside me. I'm too busy noticing everything I wish looked different.
Sound familiar?
I've spent years photographing families, and there's one thing I've noticed that never seems to change. Mom is usually the one making sure everyone looks good. She's fixing hair, straightening collars, reminding everyone to smile, and making sure the whole family is ready for their close-up.
And she's often the first one to tell me she doesn't want to be in the picture.
There's a saying among photographers that if Mom doesn't like how she looks in the family portrait, she's probably not going to purchase it. And after years of photographing families, I can tell you there's a whole lot of truth to that!
When clients come into my studio to view their portraits, I see it happen time and time again. Women immediately begin critiquing their appearance. Their arms, their chin, their waistline, their wrinkles. You name it, and we'll find something to complain about.
As a professional photographer, I've spent years learning how to use lighting, posing, and camera angles to photograph women in the most flattering way possible. But even when I create a beautiful portrait, we women have an incredible ability to find that one little thing we don't like.
And sadly, this isn't limited to women of a certain age. I see it in teenage girls, young mothers, professional women, and grandmothers alike.
Somewhere along the way, we've become so focused on what we believe is wrong with our appearance that we forget to see the whole picture.
But here's what I wish every woman understood: What you see when you look at yourself is not what the people who love you see.
You see the extra pounds. They see the arms that held them when they were little.
You see the wrinkles around your eyes. They see the face that lights up when they walk into the room.
You see the imperfections. They see the woman they love.
And that woman deserves to be in the picture.
Think about it. One day, your children will look for photographs of you. They won't be checking to see whether you were at your ideal weight or whether your hair was behaving that day. They'll be looking for your smile, your laugh, and the way you looked at them.
They'll want to remember what it felt like to be loved by you.
And someday, your grandchildren may hold those same photographs and discover a little more about the woman who helped shape their family.
I think about this often as a mother and a Mimi. When I look through old photographs of my parents and grandparents, I'm not studying their imperfections. I'm remembering their voices, their laughter, and the moments we shared. I'm thankful someone thought to take those pictures, and even more thankful that the people I love are in them.
Aren't you?
Don't you want your children and grandchildren to have that same experience?
Photographs have a funny way of becoming more valuable as the years go by. What seems like an ordinary picture today may someday become one of someone's most treasured possessions.
And you never know which photograph that might be.
Beyond our family photographs, we also live in a world where being photographed has become part of everyday life. Whether it's a professional headshot for LinkedIn, branding images for your business, a photograph for a magazine article, or simply updating your social media profile, there are countless opportunities for us to step in front of the camera.
And I believe women of every age deserve to feel comfortable and confident doing just that.
You don't have to be a certain size, a certain age, or have everything perfectly put together to deserve a beautiful photograph. A good photographer can help you with the lighting, posing, and all those little details. Your job is simply to show up and allow yourself to be seen.
Because your story matters. Your presence matters. YOU matter.
So, ladies, here's my challenge for you this week.
Hand someone else the camera and get in the picture. Get in the picture with your children, your grandchildren, your husband, or your friends. Take the photograph even if your hair isn't perfect. Even if you haven't lost those last ten pounds. Even if you think you don't look your best.
And when you see the image, instead of immediately searching for everything you don't like, try looking at it through the eyes of someone who loves you.
See the connection. See the joy. See the moment.
See the woman who belongs in that memory.
Because years from now, the people who love you won't wish you had looked different in the photograph. They'll just be thankful you were in it.
Cindy Shaver is a Certified Professional Photographer, Master Photographer, and Master Artist serving Huntsville and North Alabama. As a wife, mother, and Mimi, she understands the value of preserving the people and moments that matter most. Through Cindy Shaver Photography, she creates custom portraits that celebrate connection, personality, and the stories that make each of us unique.
