How She Learned to Negotiate

A recent offer negotiation reminded me that candidate control is everything just this week. Before approaching the client, get specific confirmation on the exact salary, PTO, and terms the candidate would 100% accept the offer before going back to the client. That clarity gives the client something concrete to approve and creates the strongest path toward closing the offer.

Negotiations can get tricky at times. My natural inclination early on in my life was to listen, ask questions, and generally say yes. As I grew through my career I learned responses like, that's a great idea, let me think on that. Generally I would then take a list of my priorities - looking at questions like - how does this fit with my professional development, personal and professional values, as well as how long is my list of to dos? Better yet, if it seemed more than I could manage - generally speaking I would try to come up with one or two other recommendations and explain why.

One of the most valuable lessons I learned about negotiation came during a conversation about my own compensation. I had taken on significantly greater responsibilities, demonstrated measurable value, and grown beyond the scope of the role I originally accepted. Still, asking for my compensation to reflect that growth felt uncomfortable. Like many women, I had become very comfortable advocating for others, but advocating for myself required a different kind of courage. Instead of approaching the conversation emotionally, I prepared. I researched market data, documented how my responsibilities had expanded, identified the value I was bringing to the organization, and determined what I believed was reasonable before entering the room. That experience changed the way I negotiate. I learned that negotiation is not about demanding your way or proving that someone else is wrong. It is about clearly communicating your value, understanding the needs of the other party, and finding the space where those two things can meet. I also learned not to negotiate against myself before the conversation even begins. We sometimes hear "no" in our heads before anyone has actually said it. Today, whether I am discussing compensation, contracts, resources, or business decisions, I come prepared with facts, remain open to the conversation, and am willing to ask. Knowing your value is important. Being willing to articulate it is what changes the conversation.

Keep GOD first.