I didn't walk away from success, I walked toward significance. I left a leadership role in the FDA medical device import industry to study anthropology and political science while raising four sons, including two with high-support autism, because I wanted to transform lived experience into research and policy that helps build better systems for families like mine. Sometimes the bravest career move isn't accepting the promotion; it's answering the calling.

After 8 agonizing months of trying to reconcile, these words helped me to choose my writing over a failed marriage. I doubled down on me when I was heartbroken, homeless and unsure of what the future would hold. Yet, I would be free. I found courage and success in my writing career as I grew closer to God and His will for my life.

I chose to leave what looked successful because God asked me to trust Him for something greater. Faith made the decision bold, but His faithfulness made it beautiful.

I walked away from a successful, fast-moving Army career in my twelfth year of service after my second son was born with health issues. With both parents facing military deployments, our family needed stability. I still wish I could have earned my military retirement, but raising three sons to become responsible men, gentlemen, and protectors of what America holds dear became the more important mission.

I learned that success isn't just about how far you can climb somewhere; it's also knowing when the path you're on no longer leads to the life or career you want to build. Walking away from something you've worked hard to make successful can feel like starting over, but sometimes it's actually choosing yourself and your future.

For years, I thought success meant working hard, building a strong career, taking care of my family, and continuing to achieve the next goal. From the outside, I was successful. I had spent years building a career in supply chain management and healthcare contracting, and I was proud of the life I had created. Then I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in 2020. Cancer forced me to ask a different question: What is success worth if I am too busy achieving it to fully live the life God gave me? I did not walk away from my career overnight. I walked away from the belief that my title, workload, productivity, or paycheck had to define whether I was successful. That shift changed everything. I began making room for the work that felt connected to purpose. I built Bonton Notary Express Solutions. I created resources for cancer patients and caregivers. I started writing books. I began thinking more intentionally about wellness, service, advocacy, family, faith, and the legacy I want to leave behind. Today, success looks different to me. It is not about doing less because I stopped dreaming. It is about being more intentional about what deserves my time. Sometimes the thing we have to walk away from is not a job, a company, or an opportunity. Sometimes we have to walk away from the version of success that no longer fits the life we are trying to build.

Having my son made me realize that my career would always offer another deadline, goal, or opportunity, but his first moments would happen only once. I had spent years measuring success by how much I could carry. Taking a break wasn't giving up on my ambition; It was choosing to be present for the life I had worked so hard to build. Sometimes success isn't about adding more. It's having the courage to recognize what deserves you most right now.

I had been a marketing and business strategy consultant in the world of retail and entertainment for 20 years, working all over the world on some pretty amazing projects I'd been an SVP at Sony, and my consultancy delivered work for clients like Ferrari and the BBC, including projects like the observation deck at One Vanderbilt in New York. I loved what I did, but what was driving me more was the engagement I had with my clients' teams. In many ways, my years of experience in the corporate, entrepreneurial, and spiritual worlds were aligning, team members would come to me with more than just "consulting" questions about their projects. After rolling off a big project at the end of 2019, I was exhausted and worried about what my next project might be, and when it might hit. That's when I asked myself a really hard question: did I actually love what I do? It was hard to be honest with myself, because the consulting company was one I'd built with my husband, a 20-year partnership. Being honest meant admitting I wanted something different, and worrying that meant hurting him. But when I let myself sit with it, what I loved was engaging one-to-one with the client's team, not the projects themselves. That was far more motivating to me than sitting in big corporate meetings espousing my advice. So I took a deep breath and exposed the crazy thought I'd been having to a couple close friends and advisors that I wanted to become a spiritual business coach. I was taken aback when all of them said, "Finally, you realize what you should be doing!" With that, I took the leap and started Pathfinder 1 to 1. It took two weeks to sign my first client, which validated my instinct and helped me gather the courage and steam to build this business.

15 years into enterprise tech (SAP, Accenture, the whole corporate ladder), I had the title, the salary, the "you've made it" resume. From the outside, I was the success story. But I was sitting in status meetings dreaming about circuits and optics instead of the project I was actually presenting. I realized success I didn't choose for myself was just a really well-dressed cage. So I left it, went back to school, started over as a grad student building optical communication systems from scratch. Traded comfort for curiosity. Traded "arrived" for "becoming." It didn't feel brave in the moment. It felt terrifying and a little embarrassing, honestly, explaining to people why I'd leave something that "worked." But I think that's the real story behind How She Did It: sometimes she did it by walking away first.

There was a season in my professional journey when growth appeared to be the clearest evidence of success. J & Fortune Consulting LLC was expanding, new partnerships were forming, additional programs were being discussed, and opportunities were opening in behavioral health and recovery housing. From the outside, everything looked successful. I was building, leading, teaching, consulting, and helping organizations strengthen their services. Behind that success, however, I was carrying responsibilities that were not always mine to carry. I was compensating for the absence of structure, accountability, communication, and shared commitment in certain professional relationships. I was investing my time, expertise, finances, and emotional energy into opportunities that looked promising but no longer aligned with my values, health, peace, or God-given purpose. I eventually had to accept an important truth: every open door is not a divine assignment, and every opportunity for expansion is not healthy growth. Some opportunities can increase visibility while decreasing peace. Others can produce income while requiring you to compromise your standards. I realized that I could not continue calling something successful simply because it looked impressive to other people. Walking away was difficult because I had invested so much. I had to pause certain expansion plans, release professional relationships, and step away from opportunities I once believed were essential to the larger vision. It required me to trust that obedience was more important than appearances and that protecting the integrity of the mission was more important than proving that I could make everything work. That season changed my definition of success. Success is no longer measured solely by the number of programs I develop, organizations I serve, titles I hold, or opportunities placed before me. Success means remaining aligned with God, leading with integrity, protecting my health and peace, establishing appropriate boundaries, and building systems that can be sustained without destroying the person responsible for carrying the vision. Walking away did not mean that I failed. It meant that I had grown wise enough to recognize when something had completed its purpose in my life. I learned that saying no can be an act of stewardship, pausing can be an act of faith, and releasing what no longer aligns can create room for what God is truly calling you to build. Today, I approach growth differently. I pray, evaluate the structure, examine the character and accountability of the people involved, and determine whether the opportunity aligns with the mission before committing. The experience taught me that real success is not simply having the courage to chase an opportunity. Sometimes, real success is having the faith and wisdom to walk away.

There was a time when I had to walk away from the comfort and security of the public school system, even though I had built a successful career there. From the outside, leaving may not have made sense, but I knew I was ready to grow, take on greater responsibility, and make an impact in a different way. I took a leap of faith and accepted my first administrative position as a Master Teacher Administrator at a new charter school. The school did not exist yet, and I knew very little about the organization or what to expect. There was no established blueprint for us to follow. Those of us who were hired had to learn together as we built the school from the ground up. That experience taught me strategic planning, teamwork, problem-solving, and how to turn a vision into something real. Walking away from a familiar version of success was frightening, but it opened the door to leadership and helped shape the administrator I became. I learned that success is not always about staying where you are comfortable or where things look good from the outside. Sometimes success means trusting yourself enough to leave what is familiar and step into the unknown.

I once believed success meant holding on to a life that looked secure and acceptable to everyone else. Eventually, I realized that if I stayed, I would have to give up my own dreams and continue living a life that no longer felt right for me. Walking away was frightening, but it was not failure, it was choosing myself and making room for a more authentic life. Sometimes success is not measured by what you keep or how much you make. It is having the courage to release what no longer fits so you can build the life that truly belongs to you.