Influential Women Logo
  • Podcasts
  • How She Did It
  • Who We Are
  • Be Inspired
  • Resources
    Coaches Join our Circuit
  • Connect
  • Contact
Login Sign Up

The "What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?" Scam: A Guide for the 40-Year-Old "Failure"

The 20th-Century Career Map is a Lie: Why It’s Time to Stop Apologizing for Your "Portfolio Life" and Start Owning Your Evolution.

Samantha (Welch) Gordano, PHR, SHRM-SCP, EdD
Samantha (Welch) Gordano, PHR, SHRM-SCP, EdD
Founder/HR Consultant
Dead Canary HR Consulting
The "What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?" Scam: A Guide for the 40-Year-Old "Failure"

Let’s talk about the Great Lie. You know the one. It was packaged in the 90s, tied with a ribbon of "stability," and handed to us by Boomer parents who actually had things like pensions and gold watches. The lie said: Pick a lane, stay in it for thirty years, and your identity will be safely anchored to a mahogany desk until you retire to a life of golf and manageable cholesterol.

Fast forward to 2026. You’re 40. You’re on the job market—again. You’ve been doing the same soul-sapping grind for 15 years, and you realize you don’t just want a new job; you want a new life. But then the guilt hits. You feel like a failure because you’re "grown" and still don’t know what you want to be.

Newsflash: The world we were trained for no longer exists.

The 2011 Nostalgia Trip

Man, take me back to 2011! Things were simpler. But the world evolved—technology got smarter, and somehow, everything else got more complicated and less stable. Why are we still trying to apply a 1950s career map to a 2026 landscape?

There are thousands of job titles today that didn't exist when we were picking majors. If you’re feeling lost, it’s not because you’re broken; it’s because the menu expanded while you were stuck in the kitchen cooking the same bland meal.

The "Good Girl" Trap

For women, this hits differently. We aren't just fighting career expectations; we’re fighting the societal "Stepford" residue. We’re told to be the CEO of the household, the nurturing mother, the supportive partner, and—oh yeah—be "fully satisfied" with that.

When we admit we’re unsatisfied at work, it feels like we’re failing at everything. We’re raised not to "give up" or "cause a scene." But staying in a job that kills your soul isn't "grit"—it's a slow-motion disaster.

Why Your "Portfolio Life" is Actually a Superpower

I joke about my portfolio career life all the time, but honestly? It’s the only logical response to a glitching system. Your identity is not your job title. Your identity is your unique, weird, hard-earned skillset.

If you’re staring at the job market feeling like an imposter, remember:

  • Retirement is a pipe dream: Since we’ll likely be working until the sun burns out, we might as well do something that doesn’t make us want to scream into a pillow at 8:00 AM.
  • Research is an investment: You wouldn't buy a house without an inspection. Why are you living a career without inspecting your own passions?
  • You are not alone: The "linear path" is a myth manufactured to make you feel compliant.

The Bottom Line

Sufferance is not a career strategy. It’s worse than death. If you don't know what you want to do yet, congratulations—you’re finally paying attention to how much the world has changed.

Stop looking for a "forever home" company. Start looking for the work that reignites the flame. You aren't insufficient; you're just evolving faster than the system.

Featured Influential Women

Tonya Lehman
Tonya Lehman
Associate Program Manager
Burton, MI 48529
Tiffany Hodang
Tiffany Hodang
Global Trade Advisor
Newark, CA
Lynnette Cain
Lynnette Cain
Deputy Chief of Police - Wayne County Sheriff's Office
Detroit, MI

Join Influential Women and start making an impact. Register now.

Contact

  • +1 (877) 241-5970
  • Contact Us
  • Login

About Us

  • Who We Are
  • Featured In
  • Company Information
  • Influential Women on LinkedIn
  • Influential Women on Social Media
  • Reviews

Programs

  • Masterclasses
  • Influential Women Magazine
  • Coaches Program

Stories & Media

  • Be Inspired (Blog)
  • Podcast
  • How She Did It
  • Milestone Moments
  • Influential Women Official Video
Privacy Policy • Terms of Use
Influential Women (Official Site)