One cannot explain what they do not know and understand in acceptance. It has taken me a lifetime of experience to understand that my experience is what I accept into being and it is only my choice of what to accept in belief and understance. None can force another to do, act, speak or believe. No one can be convinced by another to accept any idea, circumstance or value. To live is to choose to do more than survive. If we accept that we are doing all we can to the best of our ability, we know it is true for everyone. Each has different experience and inherent knowledge unique to their Purpose to function in operation, cooperation and collaboration. To live only for the self is necessary to meet basic needs unique to the self but this is only surviving. To live, one must embrace a purpose greater than survival and this must include extension of value and opportunity to another or others to enable more to move above surving. When we Unite for Purpose to excell in any way, everyone involved may thrive in accordance of will and expression. None can ever serve your purpose, function or will. If you want an opportunity or value for yourself or any others, you must take charge to fulfill what must be done in creation, expansion and delivery to the extent you can, knowing that what serves all is valued by all and if you serve your values, you will connect to others with shared values. To know your worth is to know your unique power and accept the same of all. In this, what is of value to one must be available for all in access and opportunity. You will achieve anything you can within your drive and function to act for your purpose by investing and trusting your passions. Trust is inherent in all systems of acceptance and action tied to Integrity, Honor for each and all with reciprocal Respect. This combination of values in acceptance is a force that will override fear, supression and judgement. This is your power. Knowing there is always more is the power of Faith and Hope. Love is the only force that can always sustain and spiral out into Creation. We do not unfold multidemensionally but spiral into expanse to grow and spiral down to self to understand and accept (innerstand). This is the dance we play in understance of experience and communication.

I stopped seeing my story as something to overcome. I started seeing it as something to stand on. For most of my life, I saw myself through the lens of what I had to prove. Prove I belonged in the courtroom. Prove I could lead a business in an industry that was not built for me. Prove that being a Latina woman navigating spaces where I was often the only one was not a limitation; it was a qualification. The shift did not happen overnight. It happened in the writing. When I sat down to write Redefining Strength, I was forced to look at my own story without the armor on. And what I found was not someone who had survived in spite of her circumstances, but someone who had been shaped, sharpened, and prepared by every single one of them. I stopped seeing my story as something to overcome. I started seeing it as something to stand on. That moment changed everything. The way I lead. The way I advocate. The way I walk into a room. You are not behind. You are not too much or not enough. You are exactly who your journey has been building.

My identity shifted when I realized true leadership requires a regulated body and nervous system. By studying emotional intelligence through the signals of the body and meeting my inner responses with curiosity, I expanded my capacity to hold responsibility, complexity, and even pleasure; allowing me to lead with steadiness rather than strain. I began to see the pressures, fears, and even the urge to avoid certain conversations or situations as invitations rather than obstacles. By pausing when I felt the subtle bubbling of anxiety or resistance and meeting it with curiosity rather than force, I uncovered the wisdom within those signals and moved forward with greater clarity and grounded confidence.

I did not arrive here because life unfolded easily. I arrived here because I kept going when it didn’t. I earned my Ph.D. decades ago, long before I could have imagined the challenges that would later define my life. Years later, I faced cancer, and I walked through the long, painful reality of my son’s addiction and incarceration; experiences that tested every part of me. What sustained me was not strength in the traditional sense, but persistence: a willingness to confront what was in front of me, to keep learning, and to turn even the most difficult moments into purpose. I did it by refusing to be defined by fear or loss, and instead using both to deepen my voice, my work, and my commitment to change.