What Women Learned About Themselves After Letting Go Of Control
Stories of women who surrendered the need to manage everything and found peace in the unknown.
Stories of women who surrendered the need to manage everything and found peace in the unknown.
What I ultimately discovered was freedom; the freedom to rest, to ask for support without guilt, and to grow in ways I didn't even realize I'd been blocking. Letting go didn't weaken me; it revealed that my real power was in my ability to adapt, evolve, and stay grounded through uncertainty
In 2008, my job as a computer science professor became so stressful that I actually wanted to retire. Instead I started playing bridge as an outlet, and now I am a Ruby Life Master and have been teaching bridge since I retired.
In 2018, I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and was given a one year life expectancy. I let go by staying strong in my faith and understanding that you can believe the diagnosis but not the prognosis. I have been cancer free for seven of the last 8 years. lisa ostrander
I always think to myself it isn't worth it. No need for me to respond. My saying all my life is God does not like ugly. I just give it to Him and let God take control of the situation. And it has always worked out.
I was not one to complete High School as scheduled, but I returned to school after having my 2nd children and obtained my GED and Bachelor's in Psychology in 3 years. I had to keep reminding myself it's not how you start it's that you finish God has to remain my striving force I went from A case manager to now an Assistant Director within the NYC shelter system wanting to serve the underserved
There came a moment when trying to hold everything together felt like carrying a weight that was never mine alone. I was used to being the planner, the fixer, the one who anticipated every outcome and kept things moving. But eventually, control stopped feeling like responsibility and started feeling like self-protection...like if I just held on tightly enough, nothing could fall apart. But things still fell apart. And that's when I realized: control was the illusion, not the stability. Letting go wasn't instant. It happened in small moments like choosing not to send the extra text, not rehearsing every conversation in my head, not rushing to fill silence or solve problems that weren't mine. I allowed things to unfold without forcing them, even when it felt uncomfortable. What I learned is that surrender is not weakness. Letting go created space for clarity, softer emotions, and trust in timing, in other people, and in myself. I found that peace comes not from managing everything, but from knowing I can handle what comes next. Letting go didn't make me smaller; it made me freer. It reminded me that control isn't what keeps us safe, self-trust is.
I didn't relinquish control; I recalibrated it. When I aligned my priorities with my purpose, the same demands that once felt heavy became the foundation of my succes.
For years, I believed that control was the key to success; every detail managed, every outcome predicted. But the weight of holding everything together became overwhelming. The turning point came when I realized that perfection was costing me peace. Letting go wasn't easy; it felt like stepping into uncertainty. Yet, in that space, I discovered resilience and trust, both in myself and in others. I learned that leadership isn't about micromanaging; it's about empowering. By releasing control, I gained clarity, creativity, and a renewed sense of balance. Letting go didn't mean losing; it meant gaining freedom to grow.